Betha
by allred12
Summary: The Volturi come across a young girl with promising abilities. They change her into a vampire. Unable to control her, they hold her hostage. After years of abuse at their hands, she is expelled from Volterra. In her journey away from Italy, she finds the Cullens and discovers love she never knew existed. OC/Fred
1. Burning

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight.

**Betha**

**Burning**

I don't know much about my human life. My first, and most prevalent memories are about fire, and ice, but more so fire. Carlisle thinks that this memory of fire comes from the change into a vampire, and I usually tend to agree with Carlisle.

I am sitting outside in the woods in our big Connecticut house. I love being alone, it relaxes me and helps me feel safe. Only when I am alone do I let my emotions go. I hate having to always be in complete control, but I know it is necessary because I love my family so much. If I want to keep them safe, then I have to assume a permanent, calm disposition. At least, that is what Jasper says, until I can exercise even more control.

The woods of Connecticut are beautiful, and they are different from where I have ever been. Fall has come, and the leaves are all beautiful shades of gold and red and brown. The sun shines brightly and as the rays fall between the breaks in the leafy canopy, spots of my skin begin to sparkle. I touch the sparkling parts on my legs with my fingertips, following the pattern of the leaves. I am at peace: with myself, with my world, with my past; but my peace has been a long time coming. It has been extremely difficult to overcome everything to be here, happy. It took two parents who love me, aunts and uncles who care for me, grandparents whose patience teaches me, and a cousin to be my friend. But in the end, every sacrifice had been worth the reward.

XXX

The other kids from the group home cluster together in the center of the stone chamber, clutching to each other in a tight huddle. I stay away, like the rest, I'm afraid, but I know they wouldn't appreciate my company; no one wants to get too close to me. They are afraid of where we are, but they are still more afraid of me.

A slightly tall guy with shoulder length black hair stands in front of all of us in the chamber. He is strange looking, with a pale skin that kind of resembles an onion. He is weirdly beautiful, not nearly as beautiful as the lady who welcomed us off the plane, but he still has a perfect look to him.

"Welcome, my friends. Let us eat", he says, with a weird smile on his face. As he says those words, the other strange looking people around the room creep towards the huddle of kids in the center of the room. They have weird looks on their faces, many with black eyes. Almost all of them crouch with their knees bent and their arms held up.

I am afraid, no, I am terrified. Almost immediately as I come to this internal conclusion, the temperature of the room becomes freezing, at least 0C and I know it was me that did it. I hate moments like these, and this is why the kids from the group home had avoided me.

I force my body into the wall, trying to blend into the cold stone, but it isn't working. I can see my breath now, and I begin to shiver.

"Stop", the tall black haired man says, and instantly, all the people crouched in the corner return to standing positions, looking at the black haired man immediately. He has some kind of authority over everyone else in the room; it is shocking to see how they all looked at him.

"Bring over the girl with the curly hair in the corner", he orders. In a shorter amount of time than humanly possible, an extremely large man is at my shoulder. He grabs my elbow like he is grabbing a butterfly by the wing and drags me over until I am in front of the black haired man. There are two other men sitting to his right and left, one has blonde hair, the other white. They don't seem to be looking anywhere, unlike all the other adults in the room who are intently watching the black haired man. I stand in front of him, still afraid. "Be calm child", he says as he walks over to me. I am not at all calm. Then, very slowly, as if he thinks I am an animal who is about to attack, he places his hand on my cheek. It isn't a loving gesture; I can't really determine what it is. His eyes seem to glaze over, focusing intently on something. I am puzzled, but my fear freezes my mind and body so that I can't really focus on anything else. "Amazing", he says when he pulls his hand away from my cheek. I have no clue what happened, but a girl who looks a few years younger than me, standing closer than some of the other adults in the room to the black haired man glares at me. A boy, who looks exactly like her, only slightly taller, stands next to her, also, watching me intently. "How old are you, my brilliant child?" the black haired man asks me. I blink my eyes. I have a feeling that he isn't going to hurt me, but I don't feel safe. My fear begins to subside a little, the temperature in the room warms; I can no longer see my breath. The black haired man seems to feel the temperature change and a huge, joyous smile spreads across his face as he regards me. "Excellent", I hear him barely whisper. The short, brunette girl continues to glare at me with increasing ferocity.

"I-I-I'm fifteen", I say. The tiny girl hisses violently in the corner.

"Calm down, my dear Jane, no one can replace you", the black haired man says quietly, while continuing to look at me.

"Aro, she is so young. Perhaps you should wait for her to mature. Fifteen is an emotional stage, an emotional stage that with her power may be difficult to deal with for eternity", the short white haired man stands up and says.

"But look at her Caius, she is just a human and she changed the whole temperature in this room. Imagine what she will be capable of doing when she is one of us", Aro says. "And furthermore, she seems to be able to control her power enough right now. If she were captured by any other coven, who knows the power that they would then possess."

"I cannot agree with what you are doing, why not be patient, wait a few years", Caius says.

"I cannot wait, I must know immediately what she will be able to do. I want as much time as possible to mold her into what she could be", Aro says, a physical pain nearly apparent on his face. "She will be such an asset, if we wait and leave her weak and mortal, something could happen to her, someone could get a hold of her before we do. As a mortal, she is too vulnerable. A million things could kill her."

"Fine, I see I have no say in the matter anyway", Caius says with a flip of his hand.

"What is your name, my sweet child?" Aro says, looking at me again.

"B-Betha", I choked out.

"Do you want to be strong and unbeatable, Betha? Do you want to be able to control nearly all those you meet? Do you want to be taken seriously by every individual who crosses your path? Do you want to never have to go back to the group home?" Aro asks me.

"Yes", I say, but I am slightly confused.

"Be still, my darling. You will feel better in no time", Aro says. He walks closer to me. He moves my long hair off of my neck and leans his head down. I feel his teeth sink into the skin on my neck, and then suddenly, I am on fire.

I am on fire. I am in agony, I don't scream out loud, but that doesn't mean that I don't scream internally. I feel as if I could burn for eternity, perhaps I am in hell. The fire is ceaseless, but sometimes, it is so hot that I feel cold. I think I can feel myself shivering, but I can't tell, my mind is too consumed with the fire coursing through my veins.

The fire begins at my heart, the deepest part of my chest. Then, it extends to my neck and through my stomach, a fire in the pit of my belly. Then it moves, to my arms and legs. The fire seems to slow there; it takes longer to go through my limbs. Perhaps, the complicated pattern of veins and arteries, twisting over each other and winding around the bones is slowing the fire down. When it reaches my toes and fingertips, I have an instinctual feeling that the fire is coming to a close; it doesn't have anywhere else to extend to.

The fire begins to subside. With one last, furious burn, it is over, the fire in my heart is gone, but there is a new fire, scratching at the back of my throat.

I open my eyes, and everything is different. It is like I had put on the most amazing pair of glasses in the world, and the sounds I am hearing! I hear a rat crawling along the dark, damp walls of the cave, and I have no clue how far away the rat is, but I know that it isn't close.

I jump up. Someone had laid me down on a flat stone in the middle of a round stone room. My clothes had been changed. I am in a black tank top and black shorts, they are clothes that I can move in. There are two men at the door; they are large and dressed in red robes. They are watching at me as I stretch my muscles, looking me straight in the eyes, almost like they are anticipating my next move.

"Good morning, Betha. Aro is extremely excited to meet the new you", the bigger of the two says.

The bigger one gives a look towards the smaller one, and he leaves the room. It must have only been a few seconds before he returns, and this time he has Aro with him, and Jane, the small girl. There is also some other woman, small but bigger than Jane, standing next to Aro, watching him carefully.

"Ah, Betha, you did turn out so beautifully. How do you feel?" Aro asks.

"Alive" and it is true. My muscles are tense, ready to move. I can see, hear, and feel everything. It is amazing: I had never felt so capable in my life.

Everyone around me laughs at my declaration. It isn't a real laugh; it is sinister, cynical, almost as if they are making fun of me. That makes me angry a little bit, which in turn made my body temperature and the room temperature increase slightly.

"What am I, Aro?" I ask, looking directly into Aro's red eyes. Whatever has happened to me makes me feels strong and indestructible.

"You are a vampire", Aro says quickly and without any emotion.

"I'm a what?"

"You are a vampire, and you have just been inducted into a family of sorts, the most exclusive family of our kind: The Volturi, and you, my dear, are quite a find. We don't yet know the extent of you special abilities, but once you learn to control them, you will be magnificent, my dear, just magnificent", Aro says.

"What do you mean? What if I don't want to be a member of this family?" I ask. My newly found abilities are making me bold. I would never have before dared to challenge anyone in my old life.

"You don't really have a choice, my dear. But if you are going to be difficult, we can quickly amend that", Aro says, then he shoots a meaningful glance to Jane. A smile creeps onto her face.

That is the first time I feel Jane's power, the first of many times. It is agony, I want to gouge out my own eyes, rip my hair out, and throw my head against the ground. The pain consumes me, and then it stops.

I look up, I look at Jane. For some innate reason, I know she has been the source. I am furious, I am so angry. I feel a fire gain, but it is not painful like the fire that had consumed me when I became a vampire, that fire came from Aro. This fire, it comes from me, it comes from my heart, my mind, my fingertips. This fire feels natural, it feels comfortable. I know that this fire is my one source for defense, it is the source for my retaliation. This fire is familiar because for my entire life, this fire has been my only friend. I focus all of its energy on Jane, I focus all of its power, coaxing it to go towards her.

I feel the fire leave my body, but I don't really register what is going on, but the other vampires seem to. The two guards are immediately caught in flames. Their screams of agony vibrate against the walls. Jane immediately retreats from next to them, moving closer to Aro who is smiling manically at me. The other woman has a look of fear on her face, but her hands are up, almost as if she is shielding Aro and Jane.

"Amazing, what a wonderful show!" Aro says as he claps his hands. "This is wonderful, so much more than I expected." He seems to not care at all about the two men who are in the red robes, the two men who are now nothing more than ashes on the ground.

I just killed two people. I am fifteen years old and have killed two people. I feel like a part of me has died. I did not intend to kill anyone with my fire, although my emotions got the better of me. I am an adolescent, an instinctual being guided by my emotions with consequences that are deadly. When I killed those two vampires, a part of me died, an innocence died. The fire exists physically, but a fire in my eyes died.

"She almost killed you!" Jane screeches in her high pitched voice.

"Which is extraordinary. She killed two highly skilled vampires without even touching them. That, in itself Jane, is amazing", Aro says.

"She is dangerous", the woman constantly at Aro's side says. I am still recovering from the mind blowing pain that Jane had used against me, but I know what is going on around me.

"Let's take her to the main chamber", Aro says. Jane and the other woman look at him incredulously. "She will not be allowed to feed until she learns to control her abilities", he says. I look up at him, knowing what that means. I do not think that I will be able to stand it, I am already so thirsty. "Come Betha, follow me", Aro orders.

I decide to go peacefully, that seems to be my best option. I do not want to face Jane's all-consuming pain again. The four of us walk to the chamber. I am in front, leading the group. My head is down, but I can tell that no one wants to walk in front of me, as that seems to be the more dangerous position. I smell the other vampires, a huge cluster of them, so I, without being told, follow their scent. I can feel Aro behind me, he is walking the closest to me, and he does not seem to be afraid. The other woman is following tightly on Aro's heels. Jane seems to be walking the farthest away from me, extremely wary of my new found talent, or curse as I see it to be.

We walk into the room, the doors being opened for us by two more red cloaked men. Aro crosses in front of me and climbs the steps to stand in front of his throne. "My friends, our new member, Betha has showed extraordinary talent, a talent that has no rival, a talent that I have not seen anything of the likes in ages since I first encountered Jane and Alec. Please allow us to welcome her to our family."

Aro is the only one clapping in the room. An awkward silence follows, but Aro is unaffected. Apparently, Aro's enthusiasm over my so called ability is not shared by all. I tend to agree; I had just killed two sentient beings and frightened a vampire who Aro compares to me. If Jane is afraid of me, she who can give pain so unbelievable to an individual without even touching them, then I must be deadly.

I become angry at Aro, angry at him for making it so that even more people are afraid of me. I know it was him who has done this to me, he made me yet another sort of monster, a more powerful type of monster. Now, instead of changing the temperature in a room, I can kill people with fire, I can literally take the life of a person, whether they be vampire or human or any other being probably.

I don't know much about this new world, but already I resent it. I resent it for making me even more frightening. No one will ever love me. My parents, too drunk to raise me, willingly gave me over to the government. The government in turn could find no one who wanted to adopt me. In the group home, none of the kids wanted to be my friend. I was weird then, and now, I have overstepped weird and become something a hundred times more frightening. Within seconds of coming out of my fiery sleep, I have become a killer. I want to kill the one who made me so.

I feel the weird, fiery sensation again. I feel it forced through my fingers. I am aiming at Aro, but instead, it shoots out directly perpendicular from him, it shoots through the chamber to the corners. This fire even frightens me, it is uncontrollable. I do not burn anyone, but I severely scorch the walls and ceiling of the round chamber.

There are whispers around the room and a general moving away from me. As usual, once people see what I can do, they become afraid. But I am not done, I have plenty of anger still held back for Aro, I feel the fire released again, and it is forced at the three thrones in the front of the room. This time, it is closer to Aro, but it still does not hit him. My aim is horrendous I notice. At this time, Aro holds up a hand, making all movement stop in the room.

"Apparently, our newcomer will not agree to be cooperative. I believe that she needs a different kind of training. Jane, Alec, may I charge you with controlling this child until she is old enough to control her own power", Aro says. It is not so much a question, it is a direct order.

"With pleasure", Jane says as she smiles evilly. Jane's evil smile is one of my last clear memories. I will always remember her leer because it is the catalyst for everything that happens to me. In the next moment, I go blind and deaf. I am in a black abyss, I can see nothing and no one. I cannot feel anything either.

The blackness is comforting in a very strange way. I feel no fire, something which I have not felt ever since Aro had called me to stand in front of him as a human. Under what I guess is Alec's influence, the fire in my veins, the fire in my heart, the fire in my throat, and the fire in my fingers is all gone.

I give in to the blackness; I give into the comfort it provides. Little did I know that embracing the blackness for its relief would be my greatest downfall.


	2. Nothingness

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight.

a/n: In this chapter, Betha starts to become insane. Under the constant influence of Alec and Jane, she begins to lose her mind. Since this is from her POV, it may be difficult to understand.

**Betha**

**Nothingness**

Days no longer exist, time no longer exists. The all-consuming blackness that I lean on leaves me unable to measure time. Hours turn into days, days turn into weeks, and weeks turn into months. I learn to measure time in a different way, by the violent interruptions into the darkness caused by Jane.

Nothingness is a drug to me, when it is gone, I yearn for it. Jane's pain is hell; Alec's absence of all feeling is heaven.

The twins become my constant companions. I consider them friends; they are there for my own safety. That is what my father, my creator Aro tells me. They are there so I do not kill myself. My mind is dangerous, it must be distracted.

Aro, Jane, and Alec are protecting me.

I tell them I am thirsty. They tell me that I cannot drink until I learn to control myself. They tell me this is necessary because if I am rewarded, then I will be confused. I agree, but I am so thirsty. When Alec's darkness consumes me, I am not thirsty. I love Alec.

Aro loves me. I am his pet. He loves how powerful I am. I am his favorite, well one of his favorites. Jane, Alec, and I are Aro's favorites. We know this which is why we are friends.

Caius is my uncle. He loves me too. He thinks I am special. He loves the fear that I cause in other vampires. Caius loves to show me off. Today, he took me on a trip. I love to travel.

My two best friends dressed me in a dark, almost black robe. It is the same color as theirs. It is because Aro loves me, he only lets his favorites wear these robes. When I stand with my best friends, we match. I am always in between Alec and Jane. Aro tells me that when I am in the blackness, Alec and Jane protect me. They guide me so that I am safe. I do not know if they do this, but I trust Aro and I trust my friends.

Caius took me on a trip. He took Jane and Alec too so I would be safe.

I am in darkness while we travel. I know this because Aro was talking to me in the main chamber of my home in Italy, and now I am in a meadow. In the chamber, Aro told me if I behaved, then I would be able to feed. I said ok and promised to behave. Aro, my father smiled at me, and then he touched my cheek. His smile went away, he looked concerned.

I am in a meadow. I feel the sun on my skin. I do not feel darkness, I do not feel pain. I am happy. I turn to smile at my friends, first at Alec, then at Jane. They smile back at me.

Caius comes to me. He points out a man to me, a vampire. This vampire has black eyes. He is being held by two other vampires. Caius tells me that this vampire wants to kill Aro, he wants to kill Alec, he wants to kill Jane, and he wants to kill me. Caius tells me I should hate this vampire. Caius asks me if I understand, I reply that I do. Caius tells me to kill this vampire. Caius looks away from my eyes; he looks to my best friend, my sister, my Jane.

The vampire at the center of the meadow screams, he is experiencing my sister's special power. She is amazing, I love her too. The two other vampires who were holding the vampire that hates me move away.

Suddenly, there is a mist moving towards the vampire who hates me. It reaches him. He looks around blindly. My Alec's is forcing the mean vampire into darkness.

Alec touches my arm. Jane watches me closely. No longer does she glare at me. I think Jane likes me. Alec whispers to me "Now, Betha. Focus".

I do what he tells me. I feel the fire in my mind, my soul, my heart. The vampire in the meadow hates me; he wants to kill the ones I love. I hate him, I am angry at him. I feel the fire in my fingertips. I lift my fingers; I hold my fingers up to the evil vampire. I focus all my energy on killing him. I want to please my family, I want to be fed.

I see the fire leave my fingers. It moves fast, but my eyes see its path, going straight for the vampire in the meadow. My aim is good. I hit him. I hear him scream. I hear him die. I see his ashes. Jane and Alec smile at me. Caius tells me I am wonderful, he tells me I will be fed.

I feel blackness, nothingness.

I am in the main chamber of my home. Aro tells me he is pleased with me. He says he is proud, that I did an excellent job protecting him. Aro says he knows that I love him. He says that I made him proud. He says that I will be allowed to feed now.

The doors open, a human is brought in. It is a man. He is much larger than me, at least a foot taller. I smell his blood. I hear his heart beating. I see his neck moving to the pulse. He looks at me, he looks frightened. He should be.

I crouch down, ready to spring. I am excited. I have never tasted blood before. I jump towards him, landing on his neck. I go to bite him, but he is on fire. He burns in under my hands. I was too excited. He is nothing but ashes, his blood is gone. I am still thirsty.

I begin to cry as I look to Aro, but no tears come out. I am so sad and I am afraid of what will happen to me now that I killed my gift from Aro. The room becomes cold, I become cold.

Aro tells me it will be ok, but he has a look of worry on his face. He is worried about me. My father wants me to eat. I want to eat. The back of my throat burns. The cold in the room does nothing for that fire. Nothing makes that fire feel better.

I begin to cry again and the room becomes colder. Aro looks at Alec. The darkness consumes me. It feels wonderful.

I am awoken from the darkness. I am in the main chamber again. Aro tells me he wants me to try and feed again. I am happy. I am hungry.

This time, a woman comes in the room. She is tall too, but not as tall as the man. Her green eyes stare back at me. She is afraid. I can tell she is afraid. Her pulse quickens, forcing her warm, alluring blood through her body faster.

I am excited. I hear her heart. I crouch again, and I jump on her. I put my teeth to her throat. Once again, she burns in my hands. There is no more human, no more blood, just ash.

I hate myself. Aro is not happy, he frowns. He looks at me with sympathy. All the vampires know thirst. I know it best. I am so thirsty.

Darkness fills my mind again. Alec is the only one who can make me feel better. Alec is the only person who can take away my thirst. Alec is my savior, Alec is my angel.

I am in the main chamber again. Aro says we will try something else. A vampire steps next to Aro. She is beautiful, all vampires are beautiful. Aro says her name is Corin. Aro says Corin has a gift. He says it may work. He says her gift will make me happy. I tell Aro that I am happy when I feel nothing. Aro says that Corin's gift makes me just feel happy. He hopes that it will allow me to be able to feed.

I feel a wave of happiness. It does not make the fire in my throat better, but I am happy with the fire in my throat. It reminds me of what I am, what my father lovingly made me.

A human comes into the room. This human is young, it is a boy. He is the same size as me, probably eleven or twelve. Only a few years younger than me. He has black hair, his almond eyes are slanted. His skin is dark. I hear his heart, I smell his blood. I am happy. I hear Aro tell me to take a breath. I don't need to breath. I tell Aro this. He tells me to remain calm. I try to remain calm. I have no heartbeat, so no one can tell if I am calm. No one can know what I feel. But they all must know the fire I feel.

I walk forward to the boy. He is frozen with fear. I know about ice. I am ice. I am fire. I feel cold. I let the cold leave me. The boy freezes. He cannot move. I freeze too. Did I freeze the boy?

No, it is impossible. I can only burn things, I cannot freeze things.

I am happy.

I continue walking towards the boy. He does not move. He is frozen. I walk slowly, like a cat. I watch him with my black eyes. Everyone says my eyes are black. They tell me they are the blackest eyes they have ever seen. I ask if they are blacker than the blackness Alec causes. They tell me yes. My eyes are like Alec.

I am close to the boy. His blood is so tantalizing. I try to stay calm. It is difficult, but I am happy. I jump on the boy's neck. My teeth sink in. I taste blood.

The boy is on fire. I got one taste of blood. The happiness dies. All I feel is fire. Fire is everywhere. I am angry. Fire shoots from my body. I am on fire. I am exploding. It doesn't hurt. The fire does not burn me because it is my fire.

I feel blackness again. The blackness lasts for a long time. I think I am in trouble. I should have not exploded. I need to be calm. My father told me to be calm. I try to be calm, but my throat burns. My father only wants what is best for me. Why can't I be calm?

I am in the main chamber. Alec and Jane are close to my side. Aro is talking to me. It is hard to focus. I am so thirsty. Aro tells me I am dangerous. He tells me that I almost killed everybody. I begin to cry, I sink to my knees. I do not deserve to be alive. I almost killed all the people I love. I am so sad. The room becomes cold. If there were water in the room, it would be ice. The ice I feel in my heart because I cannot please my father.

I want to die, but fire does not kill me. I tell Aro to punish me. I beg Jane to use her gift on me. I tell them I don't want the nothingness anymore. Nothingness is a gift. I don't deserve gifts, I deserve pain. I deserve the fire in my throat.

Aro says I do not. He says I am special. He tells me that I belong here, with him, with our family. I tell him no. He says I am important. He tells me that I will learn to control my power. I want to. I want to please him. Aro reminds me of my trip with Caius. Aro asks me if another trip will make me happy, another chance to please him. I say yes and I crawl forward on my knees to kiss my father's feet. Alec and Jane move with me. They watch out for me. They are all I have.

I am in darkness again.

I am in yet another meadow. There is snow, there is snow everywhere. I love snow. It reminds me of something, but the memory is hazy and I cannot see well. I erase the memory from my mind. I am in my near black robe again, standing between Alec and Jane. Caius comes over to me. He points out a female vampire. Caius says she is the one who hates me this time. He says I must kill her, or she will kill me. I tell Caius that I want to die. Caius tells me the vampire will kill Aro and Jane and Alec. I say that makes me angry. Caius moves away from me. Alec puts his hand on my arm again. He says three words "Now, Betha. Focus".

I let the fire in my throat move down to my heart, fill my chest, go down my arms. I lift my hands, pointing them at the vampire in the meadow. She burns, quickly. She burns faster than most. My fire is faster, my aim is perfect. The fire starts at her heart. Within the blink of an eye, a pile of ashes is where she used to be.

I feel darkness.

I am in the halls of my home, heading for the main chamber. This is unusual, I am usually in darkness when I am moved. I walk in with Jane and Alec at my sides. I am at the center of our line. We walk in equal strides. We are all the same height; we are all short and small. We look like the same people. The only difference between us is colors. They both have brown hair with red eyes. My hair is blonde, my eyes are black.

Aro, my father is talking to another vampire. She is short, but taller than me. She is curvy. She is a woman, I am a girl compared to her.

Her robe is darker than mine. It is the same color of Aro's. That means she is better than me. Why?

Aro looks at her like he used to look at me. He looks at her like she can do anything in the world. He looks at her like she is amazing. It is not fair.

Her light brown hair is in a ponytail. She is beautiful, but all vampires are beautiful. Her red eyes shine as she talks to Aro. Aro loves her. Her red eyes mean she can feed. I cannot feed. I am a disappointment. This vampire does not disappoint Aro. She makes Aro happy; I can see it in Aro's face. Aro is easy to read.

I don't like this vampire. Aro loves her more. She is stealing my father. I hate her. Caius is not here, but if he were, he would tell me to kill her. I know it, because Caius is my uncle and he wants me to be happy.

I look at this woman vampire whom Aro loves. I hear Alec tell me "Now, Betha. Focus", but his lips do not move. He is telling me in my mind that he wants this vampire dead too. I focus. I must focus carefully so that I do not kill my father. If I killed him, then I would want to die.

I feel the fire in my heart. For the first time it burns. My heart is breaking because Aro loves this woman vampire more than me. My heart burns. Jealousy is hot. The fire goes through my fingertips. I hold my hands up; I aim them at the woman vampire in her black robe. She burns, she screams. I want her death to be slow and painful. It is.

Aro screams at me to stop. I have never heard him scream before. It is a scary sound. I stop. The woman vampire is gone. There are ashes at Aro's feet. My aim was perfect.

Aro is furious. He screams. It is a scream of death, like the screams of the vampires I have killed. I am afraid. The room becomes cold.

"You killed Chelsea. You killed this family. You have ruined everything", Aro says to me. His eyes are black. He is angry.

I am confused. I only killed Chelsea. Aro still has me, now I can be his favorite.

Aro wants to kill me. He tells me he wants to kill me, but he doesn't know how. I do not burn. Fire is my friend.

Aro no longer loves me. I am sad. I thought I was his favorite. I tell him that he loves me. I tell him that I am his favorite.

Aro says that is no longer true. He says I must be punished. Aro tells me he knows my mind. He tells me he knows what he will do.

He will take away Alec. I begin to cry, but no tears fall. I love Alec. His nothingness is the only thing that can chase the fire away from my throat.

He will take away my home. I cry more. My home has all the people I love: Alec, Jane, Aro, and Caius. If I don't have them, I will be sad. I want my father, I want my friends, I want my uncle.

Aro says he knows. Aro tells me I must leave Volterra, I must leave Italy. I cry harder. I don't remember anywhere else, except the meadows I visited.

Aro tells me that outside of Volterra, there will be humans all around, and he knows I can't feed. Their blood will tempt me, but I will never be able to drink. The fire in my throat will be endless. I will be thirsty for eternity.

Someone rips my robe off from my body. I am no longer a member of my family, I am no longer one of Aro's favorites. I am stripped. Stripped of my family, stripped of my rank, stripped of everything I love.

Aro tells me to leave, now.

I stand up; I walk out of the underground caves that were my home. From the beginning of time, they were my home. I have no home now.

I walk out into the rain, it is night. I begin to run. I run until I am at a shipyard. It is night here too. There is blackness everywhere. There is no moon, there are no stars. I climb on a ship. Ships leave Italy, ships are transportation. Aro told me to leave. I go to the bottom, the belly of the ship. I hide in a bag, I do not move. It is easy to not move, it is natural. No moving, pretending to be dead, is as natural as fire. The only fire I feel is in my throat. I am too sad to feel anything else. I close my eyes, telling them not to see. I tell my ears not to hear. I tell my skin not to feel. I tell my insides not to burn. I create my own nothingness. It is nothing compared to Alec's.


	3. A New Shore

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight.

a/n: This chapter is somewhat spiritual, but doesn't lean towards any certain denomination. And perhaps some of you will recognize what this chapter is based off of.

**Betha**

**A New Shore**

I am in the belly of the boat. The walls are metal, steel. They are cold, like me. I see no light, but that doesn't mean I cannot see. I also hear everything: the seagulls overhead, the men's voices.

It is strange to be without nothingness for so long. It is strange to be in control. I don't think I like being left alone, left alone to deal with controlling myself.

I feel when the ship leaves, we take off from port. We are moving at a fast velocity. I am glad, I am happy to be following Aro's wishes.

The air around me smells salty and fishy. It does a good job of diluting the scent of the humans on board. I am thirsty, but I know what happens when I try to feed, and I really just don't want to deal with the disappointment.

The ship rocks back and forth. Time can be measured now, but it takes too much of an effort. And when you have forever to live, what is the point of measuring time in tiny intervals such as days and weeks and months. When you have eternity, you measure your days in decades.

I am depressed, I am sad. I am away from my drug.

What are the steps for overcoming addiction?

I feel myself going through detox, and that sucks. The lack of nothingness, the lack of the absence of burning are what kill me the most. But then again, nothing kills me, because I cannot die. I feel everything. I hear everything. I see everything. The overhaul of senses when I am so accustomed to nothing is too much for my brain to handle. If I could sleep, I would. If I could get so drunk that I could pass out, I would. All I want is my nothingness, my blackness, my Alec.

I know I have a problem, I know I am an addict. That is the first step, right?

But what the hell am I supposed to do with an addiction to nothing. Nothing is not a drug you can buy off the street. Nothing is not something you can ask for at the drugstore. Nothing is not something you can trick a doctor into giving you by claiming an illness. Without the nothingness, I am nothing. The nothingness gave me control over a dangerous part of me, a part of me that I can never accept. I wish I were human so that I could bang my head against the steel walls of the boat, then I could kill myself. If I bang my head now, the boat will take more damage than me.

My drug, my Alec protected me. But I feel the damage in my mind. Constant sensory deprivation will do that to a person. I became too used to not having the feel anything, not having to exercise a muscle. My body may be dead, but my mind is still a muscle. It suffered, at the hands of Alec, extreme atrophy. I know I will never regain my strength.

Years are washed away. A whole childhood, a whole human life: gone. My life before the nothingness, before the pain is forever erased. I know several things to be true, and that is all: Aro is my creator, my father. Aro no longer wants me. Alec is my love, because he is my drug. Jane is the one who protects me, she teaches me how to behave. I am dangerous and I am the reason for all of my pain and suffering. I can blame no one other than myself, because the fire lives in me. I am the fire.

I am insane and nothing will save me, at least, I know that _I_ can't save me.

Aro was my God, he was my everything. Now, who will I turn to? Who will be there? I am only a child. I don't understand time any longer, but I know I am a child. My mind is that of a child's, my heart and soul want childish things. Who saves the children? Who hears the children? Who sees the children?

What did I want when I was human? Who did I cling to when I was human? I can't even remember my own name. Alec erased it from my mind. He erased everything from my mind, and I love him for that. Did I suffer? Was I tortured? Who am I? Who am I? Who am I?

Betha! Betha! Betha! My name is Betha. I am Betha. My name is all I own. I have nothing. Nothing but blackness in my eyes and the fire that consumes my body. These are my defenses. Does God love girls with black eyes? Does God love children with fires in their bellies? Does God love a vampire? Does He love someone who can kill easier than she can eat? I do not know, but I do know that I need Him.

Take me God; I am yours to do with as you please.

Guide this boat to someone who can save me. Take this vessel to somebody who can tell me who I am. Take me to someone who can teach me how to live without my drug. I need you now. I need to know that someone loves me. I have only ever wanted to be loved.

But who will ever love me? I am Satan's child. His fire burns within me. I am no being of God. Vampires are made to kill, and I am a killer among vampires. God, you may not want me, but I need you. Please save me, please spare me. I know I cannot die, and maybe that is my punishment.

Is that what you want? For me to burn here eternally on earth, to live in a never ending hell. Why not just let me die? Why not just send me to hell? I promise, if you lock me down there, behind those gates to the forever burning land, I will not escape. Satan may think he knows fire, but I know fire. I am fire.

I know what I am, and it makes me afraid.

I feel fire and ice, coexisting in me internally. Fire and ice cannot coexist, no matter what any poet or dreamer says. I feel the two battling, I feel them inside of me, fighting for control. Fire and ice kill, but which one will win in me? Which nature will triumph?

I know that I am addicted to hiding, running away from my problems and hiding under a black shield, a black curtain. I need to step from behind that curtain, and let myself exist, but I don't know who that girl, that vampire is. Is she good or is she evil? Is she fire or is she ice?

How can I move on if I do not know my past? I am one hundred percent sure. I am one hundred percent sure that my past will never be recovered. It was swallowed by Alec, swallowed by the nothingness. No person will ever be able to restore what has been wiped from my mind. Aro knows pain. He thinks that Jane is the most psychologically damaging, the impending threat of pain. Aro is wrong. Alec causes more pain that Jane will ever know. The twins are not equal. We were never equal to each other. Alec always had us, he had me. Without Alec, Jane would be unnecessary. If there was nothing to compare pain to, then nothing would be everything, pain would be obsolete.

I am wrong. I am evil.

No one will ever love me because of what I am. To love is to experience every emotion of another person and still be able to stay with them. You cannot say you love someone until you have seen them go through everything: happiness, sadness, anger, joyousness, jealousy, hurt, fear, sympathy, empathy, kindness, cruelty, continuity, change. If the person you love sees all this and still supports you, then you know it is love. You know you have won.

Aro saw me, through everything. But he could not handle my jealousy because it hurt him. If my father really loved me, he would have forgiven me. Forgiveness is love. I cannot forgive Aro. I cannot love. Love cannot have me. If I don't have love, I can never be anything near human. I am not physically human, but my mind is human. I want what humans want. I want love.

I am wrong and I am evil, so love cannot be mine. God, hear me! Love cannot be mine. I do not deserve that reward, but God, I am only human, and I want love ever so much.

I am ready to be saved.

I know that when I awaken from a sleep now impossible for me to begin, I will be different. I have faith that He will save me. I am prepared for my life to change, if what I am living can even be called a life. I know what I want, yet I know what I need.

I want the nothingness. I want to forget, I want the fire dead. I want to kill the fire, douse it with water. But it is fueled with gasoline, or life. I know not which. I want to see black, hear black, feel black. Oh! I want Alec. I want his hand to touch my arm, his mist to fall over me. I love him so much! I love his ability so much! Do I love the boy or do I love what the boy does?

I need a white hot searing light. I need to give into the fire until I am lost in it. Until I feel no flames, only the flames of God, which are comfortable, natural flames. I need to lay everything down, bet my life on a God. A God who is the only one who has the power to put me out of my misery. Aro told me that I would be powerful. I am powerful, but it is not enough.

Cleanse me!

Remove myself from my body. Mold my mind, take my soul, do what you must. Give me rebirth, allow me to see the light. Do whatever you will so that I may be saved! I am a child, yet I am dirty, I am tainted: tainted with the ash I have created, dirty with the blood I have spilt.

Take me God, and remold me. You were the clay master once, be so again. Take everything. Make me human. Make me love. Make me care. Make me forgive. Make me the blank slate so that I may be molded to be what you want me to be.

My mind is damaged beyond repair. I am a killing machine, a child who knows no love. It is only you who can save me now. I can no longer give into nothingness. You created this world for all to see. Turning my world into nothingness is the work of the devil. Alec is the devil; his gift is the hand of Satan. I love Alec, he is my drug.

The man, the woman, the boy.

You were my gift. You were given to me to drink, but you burned in my hands. I killed you. You continues to kill me. What you were supposed to give, I could not take. Now, as a continued punishment, I cannot have it. You were supposed to be a success, you were supposed to be dry and rotting in a stone hole. Now, you are ashes.

You were my second chance. You were supposed to work. Who ever said second chances worked? I wanted you so much. I wanted what coursed through your veins, what fueled your body. You were supposed to be a success, you were supposed to be dry and rotting in a stone hole. Now, you are ashes.

You were my test. I was given happiness. But happiness is not calmness. I was content with killing you, as I knew I would. Either way, your fate was sealed. You were like me, in so many ways. You had a life to live, a childhood to explore, a love to find. But instead, you found me. I was content, but not with killing you. I taste your blood now, still on my lips. It is the only blood I have ever tasted. You were almost a success. But you were supposed to be dry and rotting in a stone hole. Now, you are ashes.

Forgive me!

Please, forgive me for killing you. I did not know what I was doing. I only felt the fire, the fire which continues to burn. It is unable to be satisfied, which I know now. I should have never wasted your lives trying to satisfy the unhappy beast inside me. Your lives are worth as much as mine. I am vampire, you are human. That is what biology tells us. But no, God tells us we are our minds. My mind is that of a human. There is no such thing as a vampire mind. I killed you to eat you, I am a cannibal. Forgive me, for I know not what I did then. Forgive me, because I know now what I did then.

I am wrong and will always be wrong.

My very nature determines what I am, and what I am is evil. I will always want to kill a human, in my most primal of needs. For that reason, I will always be a danger to myself and others. It if was possible to lock me deep within earth or high above the sky so that I may never return, I would. It is not possible.

The center of the earth and the utmost reaches of the sky are opposites. Fire and ice, fire and ice, fire and ice. No matter where I turn, fire and ice. They exist to stalk me, to force me to see them. They are me, I am them. No matter where I go, fire and ice will follow me, in my wake, like a mist or dust that my feet would stir up. I cannot fly over the ground, so the fire and ice will be with me always.

I pray that only God will help me, that I will be free from the influence of others.

God's pure light, His pure influence, allow it to be the only thing that seeks my heart. Send angels to watch over me, if they have time to spare. I only want those who are of God, for God, see God, hear God, and feel God. Those who are nothing, for nothing, see nothing, hear nothing, and feel nothing are not for me.

I am awoken though I can _never_ sleep.

I begin to shake, harder and faster; my body curled in a ball, my knees to my chest, my head tucked down. I feel my brain hitting my skull. If I was human, I would have a concussion. The shaking is so painful. Why don't the other men on the ship feel the shaking and scream?

The shaking stops, gradually, I go from shaking violently to rocking, like a baby. I see a white light, I feel its heat.

It is not too hot, it is not too cold. It feels, at least what I think it feels like, is a mother's womb. The white light is warm and comforting; it is exactly where I am supposed to be.

The white light is all I see. Every color exists in the white light. Everything and everyone I have ever known is in the white light. They are moving away from me, speeding towards the white light's source. I reach to touch, but I can grasp no one.

The white light is all my ears hear. It is one steady note, a continuous, yet gentle roar. The white sound is not only one sound; it is a compilation of every sound. Every voice, every instrument, every roar, crash, bang, and click. Together, all the sounds are beautiful and magnificent. The combination is not ugly, as one would expect. God cannot create anything that is ugly.

The white light is gone. I am alone, my mind is alone, it is blank.

The boat stops. There are shouts above my head, and I hear movements of feet as men are jumping off the boat, onto a dock.

What is my name?

I hear chains being tied to poles on the dock. The men speak to each other in an unfamiliar language. I do not speak any language but English.

Where am I from?

The temperature outside the boat is warm, but not too warm, almost like a fall or spring day. I don't know what time it is, but I do know it is day time because when I reach to touch the roof of the boat's belly, it is hot, but the part that is submerged in water is cooler than the top. The sun is up.

Where am I now?

I hear English above the ship. The English is different from mine, no accent. I am thirsty. There is a slight feeling of thirst in the back of my throat. It is nothing to be too concerned about. Right now, I care more about finding out about my surroundings and who I am. I look at my arms and examine my body. I am dressed in a simple black dress, no shoes; but I soon realize I do not need shoes. My skin is hard and cold, and white as snow.

What am I?

The voices are fading slightly, a combination of English broken by accents and unaccented English that is not like mine. The men are leaving the dock. I think they are going to a pub. I continue to touch my skin. It is amazing how hard it is. It is like stone, no ice. I want to see what will happen if I cut this skin. I see nothing sharp around me, so I take my forearm and bite on the sensitive skin under my wrist. I notice there are no veins there. My teeth cut the skin. It does not really hurt. There is no blood.

What am I?

Betha, Betha, Betha, Betha, Betha, Betha, Betha, Betha, Betha, Betha, Betha, Betha!

I know who I am.


	4. New York

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight.

**Betha**

**New York**

_Rosalie_

"The Volturi are in shambles, Marcus has left. There are rumors that Chelsea is gone, which of course would be the reason that everything is falling apart. But no one knows what has happened to Chelsea. There are rumors going around that she is dead, that one of Aro's experiments got too out of hand, but there is no merit to it really, at least, that is what this vampire told me. He went to visit the Volturi; he was curious and wanted to see some of the special abilities. He was denied at the door. But let's not talk about that. Let's talk about you Nessie, what is the apartment like?" Zafrina says. She is here to visit Nessie, here to see Nessie off to New York City.

The beautiful Nessie sits in between Jake and Zafrina. Jake watches her every move, like magnets. The two are going off to NYU together tomorrow, which is the reason for this impromptu celebration. Nessie had only just told Edward yesterday. She had come down the stairs and announced to her father that she and Jake had an apartment in New York City and were going to be attending NYU and they would be leaving in two days. Nessie had managed to keep it a secret, from everyone including Jacob. It was hilarious. I am running through it in my mind: the faces, the screaming. Edward just shot me an evil look. If you are going to go through all the trouble of being a mind reader, you must be prepared to hear things you don't want to. I immediately start thinking about what Emmett and I did last night. Edward begins to glare at me. I just smile back instantly. It is so fun to play with my family's special abilities. Edward begins to laugh. That is the thing with siblings, everything we do to each other is all for good fun.

Emmett and I have agreed to take Nessie and Jake to NYC. I'm a little disappointed at having to ride with a dog in the car for three hours, but Emmett promised to drive fast and Nessie guaranteed me that I could open the windows. In all honesty though, I am excited to go to the city. The weather forecast calls for clouds, possibly rainfall, so once Nessie and Jake are dropped safely in their uptown apartment, Emmett and I are going to walk around the city and grab some dinner and see a musical. Usually I don't admit my excitement, but I am super excited. Ever since Nessie was born, Emmett and I have hardly had any alone time. Not that that was really a problem, I wanted to see and experience every moment of Nessie growing up. Now that Nessie wants to be one her own, I am fully prepared to reassume my life of sin with Emmett. Edward is laughing me. Maybe I will just try to walk in on Nessie and Jacob some day and put that memory on replay for the rest of eternity. Bye-bye smile.

"Your bags are packed", Alice proclaims as she dances down the stairs.

"Can they fit in the car, Alice?" Bella asks.

Alice looks crestfallen. "I can call in a favor with UPS and get it there overnight", she says with a smile on her face.

We all laugh lightly. We have grown used to Alice's obsession with what we wear.

"Alice, the apartment isn't that big. I'm not going to be living in a penthouse suite, and I'm not going to have room for a closet worthy of a starlet", Nessie complains.

"No, but if you switch that one tiny bedroom to a closet, then you will" Alice retorts.

"Alice! That is supposed to be Jake's bedroom" Nessie screeches.

"You only need one bedroom", Emmett says from his chair arm he is perched on next to me, his beautiful laugh already beginning in the pit of his stomach.

Nessie's cheeks turn red while Jake tries to slide away from her on the couch. I can't help laughing at their discomfort and their blatant youth. They are so innocent, they only want one thing out of life, and I am so proud that they are seeking it.

"Well, I'm going to go to bed, my _own_ bed so I won't be dead on my feet tomorrow" Nessie says.

"Like the rest of us naturally are", Jasper interjects.

Nessie laughs quietly, like a bell. She smiles at everyone and hugs Zafrina, then climbs up stairs to spend her last night at our Connecticut home in her own bed.

Jake follows soon after Nessie, going up the back staircase to his mini apartment above the garage. Those of us who don't need sleep continue to talk quietly. We chat about what is going on with the Volturi, how the Amazonian clan is doing, and our plans for the future. It's weird, even when you have eternity to live, you still find yourself talking about completely mundane things.

Eventually, I grow bored. I give Emmett a meaningful look and we politely excuse ourselves. It's hard to lie about what you are doing in your bed when you don't need to sleep.

XXX

We finally leave our crypt around nine in the morning. Emmett and I come downstairs and find Nessie and Jacob diving into breakfast, albeit, Jake is eating quite a bit more. Esme hums as she works over the stove. I feel a stab of pain as I watch Esme play mother. The loss of never having my own child will never go away, no matter what I do.

"Good morning Aunt Rose, Uncle Em", Ness says as she finishes her pancakes.

"Morning", Jake says as he steals bacon from Nessie.

Nessie doesn't miss the food; she only eats human food because she has to. She loves chocolate, and that is about the only thing she will eat willingly.

"Good morning", I say back. I add a smile. I am truly excited for this trip. Watching Esme play mom, watching Bella be mom, it's all starting to weigh on me. For seven years I have watched Nessie grow up. I thought it would make me feel better; make me feel more accomplished, complete. But it has done the opposite, making me want a child all the more. The pain is almost physical; it seems to originate from my never beating heart. If it were possible for me actually feel tired and rundown, then I know I would. It is more than depression, the inability to have children. A human being is designed for one thing biologically, the pass on their genetic material, to raise young. Not being able to do that, it's crippling.

"Ready to go, Rose?" Emmett asks me. Everyone is looking at me, I must have zoned out. I plaster my fake as shit smile to my face and stand up.

"Absolutely", if I can't get what I want, I can damn sure try to escape from it.

We load up in the car. There isn't much luggage because Alice did ship most of it overnight. Emmett and I are in the front, Jake and Nessie in the back. Everyone gets up to say goodbye and I pray to God it won't be too emotional an experience.

It isn't. When everyone you know lives for eternity, saying goodbye until Thanksgiving is no big deal.

The jeep is oddly comfortable for the three hour ride. It feels almost like the rocking of a ship, relaxing me completely. Emmett and I just hold hands in the front seat. I graciously let him drive for once. Jake and Nessie are talking quietly in the back seat. I successfully tune them out. I was young and in love for the first time once, and I would have killed someone if I knew they were eavesdropping on me.

When we see the first skyscrapers, Nessie and Jake look out the windows. Neither of them has ever been to the city. It is weird to think that someone is young enough to still have 'firsts' around here. Clouds overhang the city, just as my favorite forecaster Alice predicted. Emmett and I won't have to hide inside for the entire day.

Once we are in the city, it is difficult to get to the apartment on 59th. Once we are there, I seriously consider just staying with them. Nessie claimed it to be a two bedroom, but a Cullen's two bedroom and a normal person's two bedroom are two totally different things. The place overlooks Central Park, and the one wall is mostly glass, oddly reminiscent of our place in Forks. Every room is huge, and even though the second bedroom has been turned into a closet as Alice dictated, there is still plenty of room for two people to share the other bedroom and never even have to speak. Emmett and I carry what little luggage there is upstairs. We stay for a little bit and help them get settled. We also give them a crash course on how not to burn the apartment down because those two have been catered to for their entire life. When Jake and Ness start making out in their new kitchen, Em and I bow out gracefully.

"We are free; our young charge has left us. What shall we do now m'lady", Emmett says with a totally phony British accent.

I laugh. "You know, I really want to see the Statue of Liberty, see the ports and everything", as much as I love cars, I love boats even more.

"Ha ha, do you want to go New York with this baby, or do you want to do it the old fashion way?"

"Very funny, Emmett, let's just take a cab", I say as I hit him in the arm.

"So New York then", Emmett says as he admires the view of me hailing a cab. I turn on all the charm so that I don't have to wait too long.

The cab ride is relaxing; I love just seeing the city and how much it changes in between the every ten or so years that we visit. Once we get to the ferry port for Staten Island, I suddenly decide that I don't want to see the Statue of Liberty any more. Good natured Emmett, always willing to go with my whims, decides that we should just walk all around the ports and explore a little bit.

We join hands, the city for once isn't that crowded. It's a rainy Tuesday in late August. Most families are forcing their kids to get ready for school, college kids are packing. When you don't have any kids, you have too much time to do nothing.

Em and I walk briskly along the ports, probably faster than the average human walks, but we don't really care. Suddenly I stop, Emmett stops too. I sniff, I smell another vampire. Instantly, I am on guard. Emmett is too. It's dangerous for us, meeting other vampires. Our yellow eyes can sometimes make other vampires nervous. Our alternative lifestyle is not always appetizing or understood by other vampires.

I look at Emmett; we are trying to make the decision on whether to find the other vampire or try to avoid them. If we try to avoid them and they find us, it could become an awkward situation. If we find them, and they don't want to be found, it could also be a bad situation.

Emmett forces me behind the building of a wall; I notice vaguely that we are at Port Liberte, one of my favorite ports. Hiding behind the wall, we nonverbally decide to find this vampire. It's only one, so we outnumber them, and our natural curiosity is too strong to fight. Plus, we just left our niece here; we need to make that we are leaving her safe.

I lead the way, following the scent carefully. Scents are individualized, and once you smell one once, you never forget it. This scent is completely unfamiliar. I follow it, turning a corner, walking down a dock. The scent is coming from a ship; I give a curious look to Emmett. He steps in front of me, taking the lead. There are no humans on the ship. Emmett is cautious, as am I. We get on the ship. There is an Italian flag flying on the ship. We make our way to the cargo hold, it is completely dark, but that doesn't stop our amazing vision.

"Oh my God!" Emmett exclaims. It's not fear, shock really. I come out from behind him, and I am shocked too. There is a girl in front of us, pale white skin and long blonde hair that falls in tight ringlets just past her shoulders. She is so young, almost too young. She has dark, black circles under her eyes. They are so dark. She has her eyes closed, but I can guess that they would be black. She is leaning her head down, biting her arm. Her teeth cut into the skin, and she seems shocked that there is no blood.

"No", I say as I reach pas Emmett, trying to stop her from hurting herself. Emmett grabs my arm, pulling me back.

She looks up at us, and I am forced to jump back. Her eyes are the darkest black I have ever seen. I have seen eyes of vampires who haven't fed in months, I have seen the eyes of vampires who haven't fed in a year: hers are blacker. She is weak too; she can barely hold her head up. I'm driven by instincts as I reach forward. She is a child, alone and thirsty, I just want to help her. Before I can get to her, she looks up at me and says shocking words with a heavy Scottish accent "What am I?"

I look towards Emmett. I am at a loss for words. She is no newborn which is clear in her eyes. How does she not know what she is? Emmett looks back at me with the same confusion, and a hint of fear.

Suddenly she smiles at me. I am taken away by the dimples in her cheeks that are just like Emmett's. I am a sucker for dimples. "Will you love me?" she asks.

I can't help myself. Without thinking, I say "Yes". Her smile grows and her dimples deepen. I can feel Emmett's eyes boring into the back of my head.

She looks up above her head and mutters one word "Thank you". It is strange and I don't know what to make out of it.

"I am so thirsty, but I can't drink. I kill things, but I was born again so now it doesn't matter. Right?" she rambles on. I didn't know that vampires could become delusional with thirst, but apparently one can.

"Yes honey, if you are thirsty, we can get you something to drink", I say.

"No, I don't want to hurt anymore people. I can't hurt anymore people. He won't forgive me", she says. She begins to cry the tearless cries of a vampire. Her dimples are still showing.

"Don't worry, if you hunt with us, you don't have to kill people", Emmett says as he kneels next to me. He's following my lead, but I can tell that he wants to help this girl too.

"I still can't eat. I can't do it", she cries. I am really concerned. I lean forward, going to give her a hug.

She jumps, faster than I thought would be possible with how weak she must be. "No, do not touch me. You can't touch me. If you touch me, I will kill you. No one can touch me!" she screams. Emmett puts his hand on my arm, holding me back. I have a feeling that she is telling the truth, but my heart is telling me to hug her.

"Stay here", I say. I need to talk to Emmett. I look at him, and we go up to the deck of the boat. We know she can hear us, but it's just common courtesy to not talk about someone right in front of them. "Emmett, we have to get her away from here. Take her to Carlisle, get her help, something."

"I agree, but Rose, I believe her when she says she dangerous. How did she get here, and how can she not hunt. Her eyes are so black. How did she control herself? It must have been unbearable for her to be on that ship with the sailors", Emmett says. His sympathy for the girl is touching.

"How about we have her run back to the apartment with us, grab the Jeep and drive back to Connecticut as fast as we can. We need to help her", I beg.

Emmett just nods his head yes. I go back to the cargo hold. "What's your name?" I ask gently.

"I think it's Betha", she responds. She looks so childlike with her cherubic blonde curls, her dimples, and her heavy Scottish draw. The black eyes and dark circles are a sharp contrast.

"Ok, Betha. I'm Rosalie, and this is Emmett", I say as Emmett comes back down to the Cargo hold. We are going to take you to one of our friends who can help you. He lives a little far away, so we are going to have to go for a car ride. Ok?" I explain gently.

"Ok. I don't ever remember riding in a car", she says. I'm shocked. It makes me wonder where in the world she came from, who changed her, and where she spent her newborn years. "What am I?" she asks again.

"Oh, honey, all in time", I say.

I stand up, she follows. I make certain not to touch her. Emmett leads the way back to the apartment, I take up the rear. Betha is sandwiched in between us. We run through the streets quickly. Emmett takes the parts of the city where there are no people, trying to make the trip as easy as possible for Betha. The sun sets as we run back to central park. The jeep is parked in the parking garage under Jake and Nessie's apartment building. All three of us quickly get in the car, and Emmett pulls out of the garage and rushes out of the city, back to Connecticut at an extremely illegal speed.

Betha takes the back seat. She lies down and looks out the sun roof. She looks like she is sleeping with her eyes open, I wish she could sleep. I turn around in my seat and watch her watching the stars go by.

She asked me to love her, but it was unnecessary. I already do.

a/n: Please review. I really need the incentive to keep this story going


	5. Calm or Calamity

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight.

a/n: I had a lot of fun with this chapter, finally tying two ends together. I hope you enjoy and please review. Also, in this chapter, Betha surpasses the foreshadowing in the first chapter, just a little timeline to help with the confusing aspects of this story.

**Betha**

**Calm or Calamity **

_Betha_

I am in a car and traveling fast. I don't have anything except the clothes on my back, my name, and the two people who have either kidnapped me or have taken me in to love. And, even though the clothes are fine Italian wool, I don't think that I will be able to support myself off of them. I am so thirsty, it's almost unbearable. I have no clue how long I was on the boat or how long I was where I was before I got on the boat. I have so many questions and only one answer that I am sure of: my name.

The car continues to speed home, and soon there aren't stars rushing past overhead, but clouds colored like cotton candy. I feel the car pull off of the highway and take some back roads, soon enough, I feel the brakes, and the sky is covered by concrete, a garage, I think to myself.

"Betha, sweetie, we are home. Do you feel well enough to stand and come inside", the pretty blonde woman who calls herself Rosalie tells me.

"I'll stand", I say. When I get out of the car, there are people at the door: three men three women. They are looking at me strangely, almost apprehensively.

"Betha, this is our family", Rosalie tells me as she gestures to everyone. "Carlisle is going to help you feel better", she says as she gestures to the tall blonde man. He smiles at me gently. I think I return it. As Rosalie says 'feels' she turns to look at the other blonde man in the room, giving him a pointed stare. I instantly begin to feel calm.

Rosalie goes to touch my shoulder to guide me up the stairs. I instantly turn around "No touching!" I hiss. Rose looks startled by she draws her hand back and has an apologetic smile on her face. The third man in the room, the one bronze colored hair looks at me with an expression that makes it feel like he is staring right through my soul.

I start up on the stairs leading away from the garage myself. I'm still confused, I don't know why all these beautiful, young people are coming to help me. They are angels, they must be. A group of angels just happens to find me on the ship after I am struck with an angelical light, it just makes too much sense. I smile at myself, happy that I figured out what is going on. I am either dead, or just a really lucky lost kid.

I am dead on my feet as I walk into the house, but that doesn't stop me from recognizing that the house is beautiful. I don't remember anything, living anywhere except the belly of a ship, so a cave with a mattress would be amazing to me, but this house is beautiful. It's supposed to look quaint and comfortable, but everything is just too expensive to exude humility. The colors are all dark and warm, burgundies, blues, and greens. The furniture is mostly white wood, a sharp contrast against the dark wall colors. The house seems old, and I feel comfortable in it.

The angels guide me into a bedroom. "This is Rose and mine's bedroom", the biggest angel Emmett says. "Lie down on the bed, Carlisle will be in with something to eat in a few minutes. He just needs to find it from the refrigerator" he says as he pulls down the covers for me.

"No!" I say as I grab his arm. I am afraid that if the angels see what I can do, they will leave me. My whole body is freezing and soon the room begins to freeze as well. Emmett draws back from my colder than ice hand. He looks at me a little shocked. Instantly, the angel who can see through my soul comes into the room.

"Did you feel that, Edward?" Emmett asks the bronze angel.

"Yes, she did it", Edward said, looking at me quizzically.

"What the hell do you mean she did it?" It is strange to hear angels curse.

"She has a special ability. I think that you just got a minor taste of it though. Are you ok, she seems to think that her ability is extremely dangerous, and she also thinks we are angels", Edward said. That is weird, how does he know what I am thinking.

"What's her ability, the make stuff cold?" angel Emmett ponders aloud. I know I have an ability, which should I remember, but I can't remember what it is. I try to force my mind to see backwards. I remember fire, burning people, killing people. It's a weak memory, but it is there.

Angel Edward's eyes widen. "Emmett, back up carefully. She is more dangerous than anyone could expect". I knew this would happen. I should never have thought about what I can do. Now the angels don't want me because they know I can kill people. Killers don't deserve to have angels attending to them. I don't deserve love.

Edward's eyes soften. I'm not sure I like him seeing into my mind, but perhaps it is safer, he can calm me down so I don't kill anyone. Emmett is looking in between Edward and I with a slightly frustrated look on his face. Emmett hasn't back away from me. He puts the covers over me, tucking me into the oversize bed.

"Jasper, I think we are going to need you up here", Edward says quietly. Within an instant, the blonde haired angel who Rosalie didn't tell me the name of comes upstairs. With him is the tiniest angel, I think that I am taller than her, and my angel Rosalie, the one who loves me. Rosalie comes to stand next to Emmett; she sits down on the bed next to me, humming a relaxing song that makes me want to sleep. Suddenly, I remember how thirsty I am, the fire in my throat is reawakened.

"I think it's imperative that you keep her calm, Jasper. Her ability seems to be emotionally tied from what I got from her", Edward tells Jasper. "And where is Carlisle with the blood, her thirst is killing me right now?"

"Here, Edward", another angel with long brunette hair says as she enters the room. She is holding a sippy cup. I smell what is inside and my mouth begins to water uncontrollably. A sudden wave of calm washes over me, it feels unnatural, but it is more than welcomed. Carlisle walks in, following behind the brunette angel. He is holding two more cups. The unnatural calm is the only thing keeping me from exploding with excitement. I reach my hands out for the cup. The brunette angel sits on the bed next to Rosalie, "Here you go sweetie. Try to drink it slow though, savor it", the brunette says as she hands the cup to me. I grasp it with eager hands. Another wave of calm passes over me. I lean into the calm, let it fill me. I focus all my energy on it, and then I slowly bring the cup to my lips.

It's is amazing, orgasmic, the most wonderful feeling in the world. I remember what the brunette angel told me and I drink slowly, but it is so hard. I have never tasted anything like this in my life. It is warm and thick and it eases the burning in my throat. I close my eyes, rolling in the emotions of jubilancy and calmness. I let them bathe over me and wash me, of my sins of my past of my dangerous nature. The liquid rolling down my throat feels so satisfying. Soon the cup is empty. I take it away from my mouth and give it to Rosalie. I hold my hand out for more, Carlisle is there and he gives me one of the cups in his hand. I take it immediately and begin to drink. The mixture of emotions swarms me again. I look up, the angels are smiling at me. I am so glad that I'm not killing them. It wouldn't be good if they all burned up right here while they are being so nice to me.

Edward's smile falters a little bit. I'm worried that he can see what I can do. What if he sends me away? I don't think he will, not if I learn to control it.

Carlisle hands me the third cup, I drink it quickest. After I finish it, I am completely full, completely satiated and not thirsty for the first time in as long as I can remember. For the first time, the fire in my throat is gone.

"I feel so much better. Thank you kindly, angels", I say. Laughs fill the room. I laugh too. I am so happy, so content, so _calm_.

"I think I like her", the angel named Jasper says. I smile happily at him. I like all these angels.

"We are not angels", Edward says gently. I look at him with a confused expression on my face.

"Of course you are. I was saved on the ship, and now He has sent angels to me so that I know my sins are forgiven. What else could you be?"

"Vampires", Carlisle says. I look at him with a shocked face. Suddenly, moments flash before my eyes. A talk, dark haired man telling me a vampire, the same dark haired man telling a set of twins to care for me carefully, then nothingness, and pain, nothingness, pain, nothingness, pain, fire, pain nothingness. In rapid succession, these memories come back. I feel my mouth hang open.

"I'm a vampire" I say. "I'm a vampire", I begin to whimper. I don't even notice, but Rosalie grabs me in a hug, pulling me close.

"Shh, shh. It's ok. Everything will be ok", she's holding me and cooing. Nothing is happening. She isn't on fire, she isn't dead. I cry into her shoulder. If I had tears, they would be a strange combination of happiness and sadness.

"I love you, Mammy", I say, and I mean it. It feels right. I don't remember every having a mother, until I met Rosalie.

She pulls me back and looks me in the face; she is having tearless cries too. I smile at her.

"Oh damn", Emmett says, and he envelopes my new mum and I in a giant bear hug. I think if I have to choose a dad, I would be pretty damn lucky to have Emmett.

For the first time in my life that I can remember, I am being hugged by two parents who love me.

XXX

Eventually, Carlisle has me move down to the living room. I figure that since we are all vampires, what they gave me was blood. I tell them that that was the first time I have ever drank blood.

"Really, the first time ever?" Jasper asks me.

"Yeah. I don't remember drinking, and I think that that is something I would remember", I mutter. I'm slightly embarrassed around my new family, although they have all been so kind to me.

"I'm pretty sure you are right", Jasper replies.

Carlisle and Edward are talking rapidly in the corner of the room. I'm trying not to listen, but every once in a while I catch my own name. Jasper, Alice, the small vampire, and I are watching TV. My mum and dad had to go hunting. For the past five days, they hadn't left me at all. Carlisle had explained to me how they were a special kind of vampire, vampires who didn't drink human blood. I thought that was really cool. Then I told them that they are angels, because on the ship I had asked to be able not to kill people anymore, so God had sent them to me. They found this idea hilarious.

My memories are beginning to come back, little by little, although for the most part, I don't want them to come back. All of them are frightening and violent. I have very few good memories. Carlisle has been doing research to find out when I was born and where I come from; basically he's trying to piece together my human life because I don't remember that at all. Edward, who they told me can read my mind, is using my flashes of memory to piece together where I came from and what happened to me before I found my new family.

Bella and Esme, Edward and Carlisle's mates are upstairs in the house, setting up a room for me. It is amazing how quickly everyone has taken me in. I hear the front door open. It's my parents. I leap out of my seat on the couch and breeze past Carlisle and Edward making my way to the kitchen door. I jump up and hug both my parents.

"You're back! Did you have fun, when can I go and hunt with you?" I ask in rapid fire. They both laugh at me.

"Yes, we had loads of fun, I beat your mother taking down a bear", dad says laughing. For him, everything is a competition.

"Maybe next time you can hunt with us", mum says. I haven't really been allowed out of the house, drinking the blood that Carlisle brings back from the hospital he works at here in Connecticut. I have had one brief flash of me trying to hunt, but all I got was that it didn't end well for the prey, so Edward advised me against it.

I have never been happier, twenty four hours a day every day, I am surrounded by love, surrounded by awesome people who are doing whatever they can to find the answers that I desperately need every.

No one in the house needs to sleep, so every moment is filled with research. My only job is to keep trying to remember things, force the memories in my mind so that Edward can figure them out for me. Everyone else is searching through centuries of history to find out which one I come from because apparently the memories I am giving do nothing to help find out which time period I am from.

To me, it is quite scary. The memories I do have are just blurbs, and almost as soon as I remember them, I force them out of my mind because they are strange flashes of fire, ice, pain, and nothing. Edward is almost constantly writing, drawing lines between my memories, trying to create some sort of time line for me.

My dad is good at research, which is shocking. He has been on the internet and in public libraries trying to find information about me, but apparently it is really difficult to find information about a girl from Scotland in America. Lately, dad has been suggesting that we take a family trip to Scotland.

Carlisle continues to flit back and forth between helping dad and helping Edward. Sometimes I feel bad that they are doing all this work, but mum assures me that it's good everyone has something to do, otherwise they would be worried about Nessie and Jacob being away from home.

"Mum, who are Jacob and Nessie?" I ask after mom tells me to not worry.

"Well, I guess they are your cousins in a way. Although, Jacob doesn't have to be your cousin if you don't want him to be", she says laughing.

"Do I get to meet them?"

"Absolutely. In a few months probably, when they come back for Thanksgiving break", mom says.

"What's Thanksgiving?"

"Oh, I'm so sorry Betha. It's an American holiday. We celebrate when the Indians helped the American's out by eating lots of food", mom says. She forgets a lot that I'm not American, but I think she likes explaining these things to me.

"I'm going to go play a game with Aunt Alice and Uncle Jasper" I say as a push away from the table. Mom offers to join me, but I tell her I am fine.

Aunt Alice feels left out. She wanted to take me shopping after I felt better, but Edward told her that he didn't think that was a good idea until we know how old I am and if I can do ok around human. Alice hates everyone around her living in the past when she is always consumed with the future. But I like hanging out with her and Jasper because she is funny and nice and she doesn't make me try to remember stuff that I don't really want to.

Uncle Jasper is a great help. Edward hasn't gotten any reading on my ability except that it is emotionally driven and dangerous, so Jasper helps me control my emotions, keep me constantly calm.

Even though Alice is under the impression that she doesn't help me at all, she just talks to me about her ability, answering whatever question I ask.

"Aunt Alice, can you control which things you see?" I ask.

"In a way. I chose which people I want to see, but I can't control what will happen to them. Your move", she says as she finishes moving her piece around the board.

I roll the dice and move my player around the board. "What do you think my power is?"

"I don't know. Edward thinks it has something to do with temperature because you have so many memories about fire and ice, and because you made the room cold the first day you were here. But, then Carlisle thinks that the memories about fire are about when you were turned into a vampire. I hope we find out soon though so we can go shopping. My clothes just don't fit you right", she says disdainfully as she looks at my exposed ankles. "Personally, I'm hoping you can do something cool, like erase this blessed dog smell from this house", Aunt Alice complains as she had picked a pillow up from the couch and moved it to her head to lay against the table while we played our game on the floor.

I laugh good-naturedly. Apparently, this Jacob smells bad to everyone.

"Hold on a second. I'm going to go light a candle and see if that works", Aunt Alice says as she stands up. She gets a box of matches from the table behind the couch and finds a vanilla candle. I watch intently, no one has ever used a candle around me before.

She strikes the match and suddenly and a memory strikes me.

Edward, who had gone upstairs, comes running down the steps. "Really, are you sure?" he asks me.

"The most sure I have ever been I", I say.

"What", Alice asks, a peeved look on her face.

"Betha thinks she can create and control fire. Let her try to light the candle. Concentrate really hard Betha, control it", I look at both of them warily. I walk over to the candle.

"Stand back, please", I command. I slowly raise my finger to the candle, and focus on the flame that I saw Aunt Alice light with the match. I feel a warm feeling in my chest. It moves from my chest to my fingertips, and suddenly, my pointer finger is on fire. Alice gasps behind me, but I feel ok. I lower my finger to the candle, the wick ignites. I look up smiling.

"That is so cool!" I hear my dad say from the stairs. My whole family had come when they heard Edward talking to me downstairs.

Mom comes over and gives me a hug. "I am so proud of you" she gushes. I'm proud of me to.

"Well this is perfect timing", dad says. "I just found some articles from a Scottish newspaper that had your name in it, well your first name at least, and I thought we should all take a look at them."

I smile up at my dad and follow him up the stairs to the large dark green library on the second story.

The printed out article is on the center table in the room. I sat down at the table and began taking up the article. Thanks to my new, super-infused senses, I could read faster and quicker than any human being.

_PARENTS MOURN THE LOSS OF THE DAUGHTER THEY NEVER GO TO KNOW_

_Recently, we reported on the death of forty children from a government run group home. The children had been selected for a trip to Spain by a charitable organization located in Italy, however the private plane that the children were riding on crashed killing all the children and two caretakers as well as a representative for the charity. _

_The parents of one of the girls on board, Betha McDowall, had been trying to regain custody of their daughter and are now suing the state for 1.8 million pounds for a wrongful death suit. Here, her parents recount her life. _

"_Betha was taken away from us shortly after she was born. The state deemed us unfit to raise our own daughter because we drank too much. Initially after her birth, I struggled from postpartum depression and my husband struggled to find work. We both tried to solace ourselves with the drink. _

_The state placed her in several foster homes, but she was never kept in one long. The foster parent's claimed my daughter was special, but I know that those cruel people were abusing her and keeping her for the check. When they couldn't find a foster home for Betha, they placed her in a group home. I know my daughter wasn't happy there. I can feel her pain, she is an extension of me. _

_I didn't know that they state allowed my daughter to go on this trip, and now, my beautiful fifteen year old girl is dead. The only person responsible for this is the state, and I want some compensation for everything they have put me through" -as told by Mairi McDowall_

_Mairi McDowall and her husband have been arrested a combination of twenty one times for disorderly or drunken behavior and drunk driving since the birth of their daughter. They have both claimed to have undergone treatment for their alcoholism. They claim that their lawsuit is entirely based off of the death of their daughter, a daughter who they have not seen or inquired about since her first birthday. You make the decision, concerned parents or bad people looking to strike it rich?_

I finish the article and set in quietly on the table. "I'm going for a walk", I say. I stand up and leave. Mom is furiously glaring at dad, trying to tell him that showing me that article was a bad move. I'm glad he did show it to me though, it's good to know that I am in a better place, but it is still difficult for to understand what happened to me as a child.

I walk out the door and no one stops me. I walk into the woods, becoming angrier with every step I take. I am eternally trapped as a twelve year old and my biological parents are trying to make cheap cash off my death. I'm furious. I find myself in a clearing, I can feel myself fuming, feel myself burning inside. Suddenly, I explode, a ball of fire, pushing away from me to the surrounding trees.

"Betha!" I hear my mom scream.

"No, Rose" I hear dad scream after her.

Fear clouds my face, my fire is moving and quickly through the wood. I can't believe that I just killed the first two people to ever love me, as I see my parents try to run towards me.

a/n: Hope you enjoy and please review! I hope to have the next chapter up by tomorrow.


	6. Euphoria

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight.

a/n: Sorry about this chapter being later than I said, but I was just so extremely stuck. It is hard to write something when they're isn't really any problems, but I hope you enjoy.

**Betha**

**Euphoria**

The fire is racing towards my mother. I am consumed by fear, it freezes me in my tracks, and suddenly, the ice cold fear leaves me, freezing the flames in their place. My mum keeps running towards me. _She's ok_ I tell myself. I stare at the fire, frozen in place, completely stopped. The flames are frozen into strange patterns and shapes. I look around for my dad, he is looking at the fire strangely, but he is following my mum to come to me.

"Betha, oh Betha, are you all right?" my mum asks as she hugs me tight.

"I'm fine, mum. But look at what I did", I say gesturing around to the woods. A small circle around me is completely destroyed by fire. The existing ring of fire is frozen in place; not burning anything, just standing completely still, and then the space beyond is untouched and serene.

"Oh, that's ok sweetie, just as long as you are ok", mum says as she continues to hug me. Dad runs up behind me. He once again wraps his extremely large arms around both mum and I.

"I'm so sorry I showed you that article, Betha", dad says as he hugs us and puts his face into mum's shoulder.

"It's ok dad, I shouldn't have let myself get angry. I need to control my emotions, that's all.

"Is everyone alright? What we just saw was amazing", Carlisle says as he walks into the clearing, examining the frozen flames as dad had just done.

"I didn't know I could freeze things, I thought everyone was dead", I cry to Carlisle. I have never felt so guilty in my life. The rest of the family begins to walk towards us in the clearing, all of them staring with a sick interest at the flames that nearly became their death sentence.

"Totally emotionally driven", Jasper says to Edward as they walk out to the clearing together. "I could feel such a range, it was amazing. Almost as amazing as this" Jasper comments as he touches the frozen flames.

The rest of the family examines the frozen flames as well. Eventually, I overcome my guilt and go over to look at the strange flames as well. They are odd, and to the touch they are cold. I punch one hard, and it shatters like a glass bowl to the ground. The destruction of something that has caused me so much personal pain feels great. I begin punching all the flames I can reach, and when I am done with those, I run all around the circle, destroying every single one. I am laughing manically by the time I am done.

My newly adopted family is just watching me with wary looks on their faces. I don't blame them, I must look insane, but this release of anger feels great, and to know I am not hurting anyone is wonderful. It is the best I have felt since mum agreed that she would take care of me. I continue running around the clearing after I have broken all the flames, running is just so relaxing. I don't remember ever having the freedom to stretch my legs before, and from the article that dad let me read, I probably didn't have much time to do so in my human life either.

"That felt awesome", I say after I make a complete circle.

"Yeah, I know", mutters Jasper. I laugh lightly, and the cautious looks on my family's faces are erased.

"What else do you think I can freeze?" I run up to ask Carlisle.

"I really don't know, I think I need to call some friends, your ability is getting a bit out of hand", Carlisle says to me. I frown a bit at that.

"When Carlisle says 'a bit out of hand' he means the coolest thing any of us has ever seen", dad says, giving me a proud smile as he ruffles my blonde curly hair.

The next few weeks pass uneventfully. Everyone else may be searching for my past, but I honestly do not care. I want to live in the present, something that has begun to feel like a divine gift to me. All day every day, I spend each moment with people who appear to love me. Alice treats me like an oversized paper doll, mum has abandoned her blow torch when working on cars and now uses me because I have much better aim and control over the temperature, Jasper is my personal mood stabilizer, and with him around I feel confident that I'm not going to kill someone every time I get a little angry. Edward and Bella stay to themselves most of the time, but I think that they are glad to have a kid to fill the temporary void that their daughter and her friend left. Carlisle keeps busy with trying to find his 'friend' who he thought could help me, and Esme just spoils me every chance she gets, showing me pictures of the family and having me pick out colors to paint a room that is being added to the house for me. And dad watches sports with me and explains a lot of the American sports that I don't know anything about.

Before I know it, the activity around the house begins to increase. When I ask mum about it, she tells me that Nessie and Jacob will be home this weekend. I become a little nervous about the inevitable disruption into my life which has recently become perfect. The room chills a little bit, but almost as instantly, I feel a wave of calm rush over me. I give a thankful smile to Jasper.

Within days, the fridge is filled and I come down from the upstairs library to find Esme cooking food, a strange sight for me in a house full of people who don't eat.

"What are you making?" I ask Esme as I jump gracefully to sit on the island in the center of the kitchen. I don't really have any memories about human food, but whatever it is, it smells appetizing.

"Steak and potatoes and some vegetables, when you see Jake you will see how much food he can put away", Esme replies laughing like the tinkling of a bell.

I laugh with her but I am still a little nervous. "What are they like, Esme?"

"You will love them both, and they will get used to you, honey. We are a family here, we welcome everybody as long as they are willing to welcome us", Esme says, looking deep into my eyes. "And if they don't accept you, I think Emmett will personally beat them up for you", she laughs again. I smile back.

I don't remember meeting new people before mum and dad found me, I just remember kind of everything being laid out for me, friends being given to me, although I don't remember friends at all, more so just people to watch over me.

"Can you cut up the carrots for me, Betha?" Esme asks me. I smile at her and go over to the cutting board, quickly slicing up the vegetables.

It is fun to work in the kitchen, it makes me feel human for a little bit. Esme explains how to cook to me, teaching me how to do some of the things. I never remember learning how to cook, so all of it is new to me. We finish the meal quickly, and I am so glad that Esme kept me distracted, which I realize was her intention the whole time. One of the worst things about being a vampire is that I don't need to sleep, so my huge amounts of time seem to pass even slower.

The doorbell rings.

"You know you don't have to ring the doorbell at your own house, you goofball", an unfamiliar female voice says.

"Sorry, I forgot that in your world, doors aren't much of a blockade when your father is a mind reader", a male voice says as he laughs. The door knob opens.

Most of the family walks into the large foyer getting ready to welcome the couple coming home. I hang back, leaning on the wall in between the kitchen and the front door entrance. I concentrate on my breathing so that I don't make the room cold, and then everyone would know I am nervous.

"Mom, dad", the tall girl with reddish brown hair and brown eyes says to Bella and Edward as she hugs both of them.

"Jacob, what are you wearing?" Alice asks the tall Native American man with a murderous look on her face.

"Clothes that make it look like I don't have a bank account the size of the national deficit. We live in New York City, there are these people who are called muggers and tend to look for people dressed like they are worth a million buck", Jake says rolling his eyes as he hugs Esme.

"Who would mug a six foot seven werewolf", Bella asks as she hugs Jacob after passing her daughter off to mum.

"Shut up Bells, I don't want Alice to kill me before I even make it through the front door", Jacob laughs as he hugs Bella.

Everyone stops hugging each other and the bickering conversations. Suddenly, both Nessie and Jake are staring at me.

"You must be Betha. I am so excited to meet you, and so glad not to be the baby of the family anymore", Nessie says as she comes over and hugs me.

"I think she's older than you by about twelve years, Ness", Edward laughs. I do the math and discover he's right.

"That doesn't count. We are only counting from when she was turned into a vampire", Nessie grumbles. "Plus you look younger than me", she says as she looks down at me.

"So nice to meet you too", Jacob says as he extends a hand to me. "Since Alice has a new victim, she may not focus so much on me."

"I think Alice has plenty of energy to spend on eight more victims if she had to", I say as I shake his hand.

He laughs a loud booming laugh and it makes me laugh too. I feel the temperature of the room heat up slightly. Feeling happy makes the fire roar comfortably in my chest, like a good friend or like a beating heart.

"I have dinner ready", Esme finally says after all the introductions are finished.

"Yes, I am famished. I don't think I can make it another three months on cafeteria food", Jake says.

Nessie hits him playfully, "You just ate at a diner three hours ago", she says.

"Yeah, _three_ hours ago", Jake mumbles as he rubs his arm where she hit him.

We make our way to the large dining room. Everyone sits down for courtesy's sake even though only two people are eating.

We continue to talk, Jake and Nessie talk about all their classes and everything that is going on with them in New York City. I catch them looking at me sometimes, but I think someone from the family told them to not ask me too many questions. That gives me a weird feeling, like I'm protected, but like whoever told them is also trying to protect Nessie and Jake.

After the two of them finish dinner (and I do witness Jacob eat about seventy five percent of the huge meal that Esme and I prepared) we make our way to the living room. The living room is large with dark blue walls and white wood work with big white leather couches. The room is divided into two different areas with couches. One area surrounds a huge TV for which Dad takes the remote and turns on an American football game, a sport which appears to be his favorite. The boys in the family intently pay attention to the TV, making bets and cheering on the team they want to win.

The girls and I stay on the other side of the room, the one that surrounds the fire place.

"Betha, can you start the fire for us, dear, I think the sound might drown out the boys a little bit", Esme says. I nod my head and point my finger towards the fireplace. The fire lights easily and its crackling adds a cozy feeling to the atmosphere. Nessie jumps about a foot from her spot on the couch next to her mother. Dad was watching me and I hear his booming laugh from the couch when he sees Nessie's reaction.

Nessie looks at me apologetically. "I'm sorry. I was warned that you could do that, it's just a little shocking to see in action", she smiles.

"That's ok", I say, smiling encouragingly back at her.

"Yeah, wait till you see her really in action", dad says from the couch without looking away from the game.

Mum laughs with him this time, and I join in too.

"Ok, I can tell when Uncle Emmett is throwing me a bone. What else can you do", Nessie asks me after her own laugh dies down.

"Um, I don't really know. I can make fire and it can kill vampires. And I froze some flames one time. Mum uses me as a blowtorch a lot, and I can kind of be like a heater or air conditioner", I ramble as I try not to meet her eyes. I feel like I'm bragging and it makes me a little self-conscious.

"That is really cool", Nessie says encouragingly. I decide that I like her, already she feels like some sort of cousin or big sister.

"So Nessie, I was thinking about taking you and Betha shopping on Monday, maybe in New Haven or Hartford, whatever you would like", Alice says cheerfully.

I inwardly groan. Not that I don't like shopping, just Bella told me that shopping with Alice is the iron man of marathons.

"Ok, I'd love to. Of course you might have to get rid of some of the old clothes so I have room in my apartment", Ness says sarcastically.

"Of course. You need a completely new wardrobe, all those were just for the fall", Alice says completely serious. Nessie's jaw drops as she realizes her aunt isn't kidding.

Suddenly, the phone rings. Carlisle goes to pick it up. We all know it's another vampire because we can't hear the voice on the other end of the receiver.

"Yes, it's so good to hear from you too", Carlisle says into the receiver. "No, we are still in the Connecticut house—Well, you could fly in and we could pick you up if you don't want to do that—Yeah, I can have one of the kids pick you up—We could really use your help, I'm not so good with the more physical ones—No, she's young, so she doesn't have much control yet—That would be wonderful, and you know you have a place to stay here—Oh, yes, Esme will be delighted—Ok, we will see you then." He hangs up the phone and looks towards everyone. "Some of our friends from the Egyptian coven are coming to stay with us, Benjamin and Tia. Benjamin wants to meet Betha."

I look curiously at Carlisle, but some other members of the family cheer. Apparently, it's a good thing that these people are visiting. "Mum, mum. Who are Benjamin and Tia?" I ask mum as the commotion begins to settle.

"They are friends of ours, and Benjamin is special like you, sweetie", she says as she rubs the frown lines out of my face. "He can control the elements; you know water, earth, wind and fire. It's the only other purely physical power that our kind knows of, besides yours of course. Carlisle hopes that he will be able to show you how to control it more", mum tells me.

"He makes fire like me?" I ask, wondering immediately if he is just like me.

"No. Fire has to be there for him. He manipulates the elements that already exist. You seem to change the temperature, making the space around so hot that things and the air particles around you catch on fire or making things so cold that you can freeze the air. But both of your gifts are physical, existing in the realm of actuality and not in the realm of your mind", Edward tells me from the other set of couches.

"Isn't Uncle Jasper's power physical though too, that's why mom can't block it", Nessie asks. I'm glad that I'm not the only one who doesn't seem to really grasp these special abilities.

"Yes, but it's not as powerful as Betha's. It's also not really the same thing. My power is emotions. Her power is driven by emotions. It a hard line to comprehend, but it is crucial to understand the difference", Jasper adds, not even taking his eyes off the screen.

"Oh", Nessie says. "I think you will like Benjamin, Betha. He is really nice and a cool guy. I'm excited he isn't bringing anyone else with him except Tia. Tia is cool too. She is really nice", Nessie assures me. I smile at her and decide I really like her.

We continue to chat well into the night; mostly Alice discussing what I need clothes wise. I haven't realized, but I really do need to go shopping. The whole family doesn't let me out of the house too much; they don't know how I would act around humans since I have never really been in that situation before. Plus, everyone wants to keep me close to Jasper so he can have control over my emotions in case there is a chance I can lose control. I have been wearing clothes that were left over from when Nessie appeared to be about my age. They don't fit me too well. Whereas Nessie is tall and slim, I'm also tall, but there is quite a bit more muscle too me. I am limited to stretchy clothes like leggings and t-shirts, so Alice is itching to take me shopping.

Eventually, Nessie and Jake say that they need to go to sleep. They go to their respective bedrooms and the house quiets down so that no one will wake them.

"Am I really going to be allowed to leave with Alice on Monday?" I ask the whole family.

"I don't see a reason why not", Bella says.

"Yes, absolutely, if you take Jasper with you", Carlisle says. Dad and Jasper are playing chess right now as we wait for the night to end. Most of the family is watching the game intently. "And once you work with Benjamin for a while and learn to control your abilities, then we can even talk about you starting school and blending in with the rest of the family", Carlisle continues.

I groan. "I don't think I really want to go to school", I say. I can only imagine what it would be like: the new girl with the strange accent and pale skin who can't really be friends with anyone because she might accidentally drink their blood.

Edward laughs; I send him a scathing look.

"Wouldn't I have to go to, middle school or something, so that we can stay at a place longer? I'm at that awkward stage where I'm supposed to be growing like a weed.

"Probably, although I'm sure it would be safer if you went to school with the rest of us", mum says to me.

"Ok", I reply. I'm reassured. I choose not to worry about school, or shopping, or even Benjamin's arrival. I'm happy and I couldn't be happier. My life is perfect. I read in one of the books from the library that euphoria isn't real, but I beg to differ.

a/n: Please review, and since I didn't upload this chapter until a day later than I said I would, I think I might stay up late and write another chapter now that I am back in the groove.


	7. Man, I Don't Feel Like A Woman

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight.

a/n: This chapter was a lot of fun to write because I got to go a little girly with it, hope you enjoy and please review!

**Betha**

**Man I **_**Don't **_**Fell Like A Woman**

"Alice, do I really need this many pairs of jeans?" I ask as Alice adds yet another pair of designer jeans to the giant pile already in my hands. Jasper just laughs at me in the background.

"Yes. Jeans are the essential part of any outfit, plus they will make you look older if they are a dark wash", she says blatantly. I turn to Nessie and roll my eyes.

Alice woke Nessie up early in the morning, and she had Jasper and I in the car before the crack of dawn. We drove the entire way to Hartford in under an hour and the shopping began as soon as the stores opened. We had started with Nessie's wardrobe, which was surprisingly quick because Nessie had insisted on building on her current wardrobe rather than starting from scratch. Ness is carrying about eight bags filled with sweaters, long sleeve dresses, boots, and some fancy coats. When Alice had tried to drag Nessie into a fancy lingerie store, Nessie firmly put her foot down and the Nessie portion of shopping was quickly over.

Now, we are working on my wardrobe. We are still on the first store. I am getting a little frustrated, but with Jasper's help and me lying to myself, my emotions are keeping relatively in control. I know I need clothes, but really, this many? Alice is a force to be reckoned with. She decided to start with jeans, and that is why I have every style in every shade of a dark wash piled up in my arms. If I weren't a vampire, I would be falling on my ass right now.

"Ok, let's go try those on", Alice says looking appreciatively at the pile.

"But you already know my size—", I try to protest.

"I need to see how they look so I get a feel for what looks good on you", Alice explains like it is the most obvious thing in the world.

In the dressing room, making great use of vampire speed, Alice decides that out of all the jeans, only two pairs work. I look appreciatively in the mirror. I was fifteen when I was changed, so I have almost no curves whatsoever, but the jeans Alice has me in at least make me look like I have something. Tight at the bottom and low at the top, they make my hips look like they curve out much more than they do. Alice orders me to take the skinny and boot cut jeans off. She takes those and grabs them in five more shades each, totaling ten pairs of jeans that she pays for with a special looking card.

We make our way to yet another store, and here, Alice choses fancy mini dresses, most of them with long sleeves. I ask her where in the world I am going to wear these. She looks at me with such a frustrated look that I decide to back down.

The next store we go to is filled with pale shades. Alice picks out shirts and sweaters of every single shape, and ends up buying nearly all of them. Then she grabs coats and jackets for me too, even though when you are in control of your own temperature, you really don't need clothes to modify your temperature, although I guess it all goes to the human appearance.

Finally, we get to shoes. I beg Alice for sneakers, and she finally gives in a little bit, but I have to compensate too, and I end up with five pairs of heels.

"Alice, I've never worn heels before", I complain.

"From one shorty to the next", she mutters to me, "They are the best invention in the world". I roll my eyes and give in. It's not my fault I'm short.

At lunch time, we take a short break for Nessie to eat some food, then, we continue shopping. It is five o'clock when we pile the numerous bags into my dad's jeep. Alice had insisted using the jeep because none of the other sport's cars had enough room to hold all of our bags. As it is, there is barely enough room for Nessie and I to sit in the back seat without having to sit on each other's laps.

Jasper drives home quickly, and when we get home, the stars are beginning to come out. Nessie drags herself upstairs, holding her bags. I hear her drop the bags on the floor and fall, exhausted, into bed. I laugh quietly to myself.

"Ok, to your room, we have to put all your stuff away", Alice says as she swats me on the bottom.

"My room, what do you mean?" I ask as I give her a confused look.

"You're home finally. Come on, we have been waiting all day", mum says as she comes out from the living room and gives a severe look to Alice. She takes my hand and leads me back to the living room. There is a door off of the wall that connects the living room to the dining room. I look to mum and she nods to me to open the door.

The room is blue; a beautiful light blue that seems to have greenish tinge to it. It was the exact color that Esme had had me chose, and I chose it because it somehow reminded me of my human eyes. The carpet is a thick, lush off white that tickled my toes. There is no bed. There is a fireplace in one of the corners next to a pair of French doors that open to the yard, and there are white candles everywhere. I laugh at that, but I do really love candles. There are large dark leather couches and a large closet that is the size of another bedroom. A large bathroom is off of the main structure. The room feels like me, fire and ice coming together. It is adult, but young. It is perfect and so beautiful.

"Thank you so much Esme, mum", I say as I hug both of them tightly.

"Ok, enough with the interior design. Look at everything we bought, Rose", Alice says as she drags the bags and mum to the center of the space in between the couches. Mum laughs like a gorgeous bell and grabs my hand as Alice drags her around.

The bags are all upturned onto the ground. She divides the massive pile into tops and bottoms and dresses. Mum absentmindedly takes the clothes in her hands and looks at the pieces, commenting on what she thinks is really nice. Alice flits back and forth between the closet and the giant pile, showing each piece to mum before she puts it away. Some of the pieces I don't even remember. Mum smiles at me encouragingly and sympathetically. Before long, my entire new wardrobe is put away. Alice comes to sit on the couch and starts playing with my hair. Holding it in different styles and asking mum what she thinks, then letting it fall back to my shoulders. It relaxes me almost instantly.

"It's amazing how much she looks like you, Rose", Alice says as she stretches out one of my blonde curls and lets it retract.

"I think she looks like Emmett", mum says as she stares back at me quizzically. She sounds absolutely sure in her assertion.

"Yeah, I see that too, the dimples and the corkscrew curls", Alice says as she tugs another curl. "But the blonde hair is yours." Mum smiles lovingly towards me.

"Why do you think I fell in love, Alice", she says so gently and lovingly that I can't help but beam at her.

"Will I always be fifteen?" I suddenly ask. A thought suddenly occurs to me as they talk about me like I'm a child, a mixture of my parents.

"Oh honey, we told you yes", mum says as she moves closer to me.

"Yeah, but I mean like in my mind", I say. Mum and Alice look at each other, and I can feel that I won't like the answer.

"It is hard to explain, but in a way yes", Alice says. "You will always be emotionally and physically fifteen years old, but intellectually, you will accumulate knowledge until your far surpass your physical and emotional age. So you will act older, but you will still look younger and have some of the emotional tendencies of a fifteen year old", Alice says.

"I know it's sad and difficult to think about never aging, but we will always be here for you, honey", mum says as she rubs her hands comfortingly up and down my back.

"But, I will never think like someone who's older. I will always think like a teenager?" I ask.

"Yes", the both say in unison.

"Oh", I mumble. I have been confused about the age thing. When I look in the mirror, I see a little girl, but I don't really feel like one. Dad found my birth certificate on fire weeks ago. I was born August of 1994, so I should be about eighteen years old, an adult. But I do not look like an adult at all. Age to me has become non-determinant. It is disheartening to be around all these beautiful _women _and to be the one who looks like a little kid. Flat chested and short with a cherubic face doesn't sound so good when you are stuck that way for eternity. The more concerning thing to me is that I will never change emotionally. I'm surrounded by love. Everyone is paired up. Will I ever be able to emotionally maintain a relationship like theirs? Will I ever have a significant other, or will I always be the like some floosy teenager who thinks she sees love everywhere when there is really nothing? I became extremely worried that I would be alone for the rest of my life. I'm worried and I'm sad, mourning what I could have been had I not been made into a vampire. Alice and mum watch me carefully. I can tell that they are silently arguing whether or not to go get Jasper to calm me down. They finally decide against it and mum hugs me tightly, continuing to rub my back. Alice slowly gets up and leaves the room.

"Honey, it's ok", she says. "I know it's difficult to take it all in, to understand everything, but you watch, everything will work itself. It always does" she finished as she gets a faraway look on her face.

"What do you mean?" I ask.

"Well, it's a long story and it's sad. Are you sure you want to hear it?" she asks me gently.

"Yes, absolutely", I say immediately.

"Ok. It starts out in 1915. That's the year that I was born. My human life was a lot easier than yours, sweetie, almost too easy. My mom and dad were wealthy and untouched by the Great Depression. We had a huge, lovely house and my parents loved to show me off to the community as the beautiful, future trophy wife. I was promised to a man named Royce. He was handsome and one of the most eligible bachelors in town. I was about to have everything I had ever wanted. But, I was attacked and left to die in the street. Carlisle came and found me, and changed me. Everything had been within my grasp, and then it was suddenly all gone. I was alone for a few years, but then I found your father. I was better; I had found the love that I had always wanted. But there was still something I wanted more than anything in the world: a child that I could call my own. I waited for years, then Bella had Nessie which gave me hope, but then I was also destroyed to because I knew that Nessie would never be mine. But then Betha, you came along, and suddenly, everything I have ever wanted was mine again. I have never been happier, and even though it took a long time, I finally have everything I have ever wanted", she said, smiling at me sweetly.

I look at her, trying to figure out what is the right response. She sees the struggle on my face and hugs me again, tightly. "Whatever you want Betha, it will all come to you in time", she says as she hugs me even tighter. If we could cry, we both would be doing so.

She loves me. I have learned so much about love since living with the Cullens. Perhaps I will find romantic love for myself, but I can, for the time being, be content with the familial love that mum and dad give me every chance they get. I have a lot of questions, a lot of unanswered parts to my past and even more open ends for my future, but with people who love me and support, nothing will ever stand in my way.

XXX

Alice is getting me dressed for the day. She does this every day, and seems to derive extreme pleasure from it. I'm wearing a designer cream colored sweater with dark skinny jeans. A pair of brown, equestrian style, mid-calf height boots with a little bit of heel complete the outfit. She quickly tosses a leather jacket to me which I shrug into. She ties my hair up and pins it into a loose bun with some curls framing my face. When Alice is done with me, I look much older than fifteen, something which she accomplishes each day without fail. I know she is doing it for me, and I couldn't love her more than when she silently helps to boost my self-confidence.

Suddenly, the doorbell rings.

"I knew it", Alice says as she puts the mascara wand back in its bottle and throws it down on my bathroom sink. She tries every day to convince me to wear mascara on my naturally blonde lashes, but, even though I can kill vampires without the blink of an eye, a mascara wand scares me too much.

"Benjamin, Tia!" Alice shouts as she hugs both of them. The rest of the family is in the doorway as well. Carlisle moves up to shake their hands.

"It is so nice that both of you could make it", he says politely.

After all the greetings are finished, dad pushes me forward a little bit until I'm standing in front of Benjamin and Tia. "This is Betha", he says. Benjamin and Tia both stick their hands out for me.

"It is an honor to meet you", Benjamin says as he shakes my hand.

"It's nice to meet you too", I say, a little shocked with his outdated formality.

He isn't very tall, perhaps only fifteen centimeters taller than me. He also looks my age. His eyes are a bright red, which I know means that he isn't a vegetarian like my family.

Tia looks older than Benjamin. She is beautiful like all vampires. She has dark long straight hair that frames her strong face. Her eyes are also red and both of them have an olive tone to their white, pale skin.

Benjamin laughs a little, probably at my shocked look. Carlisle suggests that we go to the dining room to sit down and talk, and also watch Jake and Nessie eat another massive breakfast created by Esme.

"Nessie, the last time I saw you, you were shorter than my knee, now you are taller than me", Tia says affectionately as puts her arms around Nessie.

Nessie laughs "Yeah, I guess seven years flies fast."

Everyone continues to chat about the seven years that passed before I came and since Benjamin and Tia had last visited the Cullens.

"Ok, enough of this small talk, I really want to see what Betha can do", Benjamin says, his red eyes glinting manically as he laughs. He seems like an eager child.

Dad laughs "Oh, you will be impressed once we can get her out of the house, I think that Esme would kills us all if we destroyed her house."

"But I won't be angry if she lights a candle", Esme says as she pushes the candle from the center of the table towards me.

I smile lightly at her and then point my finger at the candle. Instantly the wick catches on fire. Benjamin laughs. He holds up his hands and makes the fire fly off the candle and jump around, taking the shape of a jack rabbit as it flies over our heads.

"You and I could make a great team", he smiles at me. I smile back as he guides the fire back to the candle. "Why do you need me though, she seems to have pretty good control" he adds.

"It's dangerous when she tries to use it on a larger scale. The effect her emotions have on it also make it hard to control", Carlisle responds.

"What's wrong with that?" Benjamin asks.

"Have you ever heard of mood swings?" dad retorts while laughing.

I grumble a little bit. I don't like it when people talk about me like I'm not here. It's making me angrier as I think about it. The room begins to get really hot, so hot that Jake is sweating. I don't feel the usual wave of calm that Jasper sends my way in situations like this.

"This would be example A", dad says while looking at Benjamin who clearly feels the change.

"Ok, Jasper, cool her down", Edward says once I get to the brink of fire. The wave of calm instantly comes over me.

"Ok, I see your issue", Benjamin laughs. "Anything else you have up your sleeve?" he asks me.

"I can freeze things", I say. I haven't done it on call yet, but I don't see why I can't try.

"Ok, go ahead", Benjamin says as he lifts the water from Nessie's dinner glass and moves it in a giant globe towards me, I focus on cold and making sure the water doesn't get my head wet as it flies towards me. I freeze it; it stays suspended in the air in front of me.

"That is way cool", Benjamin says looking at the ice in the air, usually the reaction that I get from people.

"I think that the two of you are going to get along well", dad laughs as he rubs my head again.

I'm hopeful. If this guy can train me, then maybe I can live more normally, learn to defend myself, learn to control my abilities without having to feel numb inside. The possibilities are endless, and I can't hide my excitement.

"Can we start training now?" I ask Benjamin.

He laughs. "How about we wait a little bit, kid?"

"You don't look any older than me", I accuse a little haughtily.

"Yeah, but I think I have a couple centuries on you", he laughs back.

I cross my arms stubbornly. A laugh trickles around the room. This age thing is becoming a point of contention for me. I'm perpetually stuck as a pubescent teenage girl while I'm surrounded by beautiful twenty somethings. Yeah, being stuck as a kid for the rest of my life is beginning to suck.


	8. Stuck In My Head

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight.

**Betha**

**Is Stuck In My Head**

When I first accidentally nearly burnt the house on fire, dad had me watch Rocky. Actually, he had me watch all the Rockies. He compared me to the Italian guy saying something about how he used his emotions to beat the crap out of people, but it worked better when he trained and focused more on channeling his anger. I thought it was cool, a really valuable bonding experience, but now that I am being treated like Rocky, I totally emphasize with the poor guy who had to chug eggs and run up and down steps all day.

If I didn't know that Benjamin had been changed two hundred years ago, I would swear that he had been a personal trainer in his human life. But something tells me there weren't personal trainers on the streets of Egypt in the early nineteenth century. We train constantly, and since there is no need for sleep (and apparently no regard for how physically demanding it is to change temperatures so that air particles catch on fire) nothing stops us. Benjamin told me to consider myself lucky when two days ago he let me take a break so we could see Jake and Nessie back off to college.

First, Benjamin would piss me off by teasing me and really getting under my skin. This would of course cause me to 'blow up' and expel fire from me instantly. He would force me to keep it under control and manipulate where this 'explosion' would go. Soon (well not soon, more like months), it took a lot more to piss me off, and even when he did, I wouldn't explode, but I could concentrate the power to go to a certain point. Now, it takes a lot to anger me: like personally attacking me physically, or attacking my family is about all that will set me off.

Now, we are working on channeling, or at least developing the 'ice' in me. The ice for me is different. It is harder to control because it is centered on fear. Fear is instinctual, which means naturally I don't have control over it. Anger is a defense mechanism, while fear is the step before anger for me. Fear is there to trigger my body to respond with anger, so fear is something that I have taught myself to skip over, except in the most dire of circumstances. Also, it is hard for me to fear anything; I know that fire can't hurt me. When I freaked out once and almost killed Benjamin, he shot the fire back at me without thinking. It tickled, but it didn't kill me. So now, I'm afraid of nothing, except losing my family. So, Benjamin uses that against me, threatening my family, telling me that if I don't learn to control my powers, then I may accidentally hurt them.

"I just can't to it, can we please take a break", I complain to him.

"If you want to learn how to control this, you can't take breaks", he argues back.

"The ice doesn't scare me. I don't care if I can control it or not. We don't even know how it works", I say back, beginning to get angry. But it's only anger that fills me, no fire bubbling in my belly.

"You need to control it. You have a gift, and if you don't learn how to use it, then you will never reach your full potential. You want to grow up, this is the first step", he retorts.

"I am grown up", I hiss back at him.

"Yeah, well you aren't acting that way", he says back easily, like his insulting me has no effect at all.

"I am too acting like it. You work me out here like a dog; you don't give me any breaks. You abuse me just as bad as anyone I've ever known, and I am supposed to stand here and take it", I growl.

"No you aren't. You are relying on the comfort of your family, you are relying on your uncle's ability to calm you down, and you are relying on their forgiveness if you ever accidentally kill someone. If you were _grown up_ you would see that this ice is your only insurance policy against killing someone", he says as he crouches into a defensive position just in case.

"SHUT UP", I shout. I feel the ice in my heart. I'm so well trained that there isn't a heat rising in my chest. It is pure ice, pure frustration. There might even be some fear in there, fear that I will never grow up, because I realize Benjamin is right. It releases from my body like a wild animal released from its cage. It shoots towards Benjamin and instantly, he is frozen. He is frozen like a rock. I want to touch him, to see if he is colder than a real vampire. I can tell he can't move, but I can't tell if he is aware of what is going on.

I can't help myself, I freak out. I scream for someone to come. We are in the woods, far away from the house just in case of any accidents. I hear some of my family members running towards me, and now I'm even more afraid. What am I going to say _Oh, he was provoking me, so I managed to freeze a technically dead person making him more dead and now I don't know what to do. I know this is my power and all, but someone has to bail me out because I'm nothing more than an immature kid_. Yeah, that is going to work. Benjamin is right; I do lean on my family. Even if he was just trying to provoke me, like I thought he was, that doesn't mean that what he is saying isn't based on fact.

Edward is the first to reach me; I know he is the fastest. He stares at Benjamin with a strange mixture of shock, horror, and interest.

"I think I killed him. Can you hear his thoughts?" I whisper. I'm afraid. I now know why Carlisle chose Benjamin to come and train me, because it is practically impossible for me to kill him, but apparently, impossible doesn't apply to me, because I just managed to freeze a vampire to death, a very powerful vampire.

"Betha", mum screams as she comes up and hugs me. I freeze, although obviously not as much as Benjamin is. I am too dangerous for anyone to be around. I've managed to train and preen one ability, and now here is another that is going to get me in more trouble.

"You didn't kill him. He is just frozen. I have no clue how you did this", Carlisle says as he feels Benjamin. "Concentrate on warming him slowly, Betha. Really concentrate. If you burn him, he won't be able to defend himself, so you will kill him", Carlisle orders, his voice steady as he looks to me.

"Concentrate, Betha", dad says as he joins mum and holds my hand. I take my hands away from my parents and hold them gently in front of Benjamin.

I focus all my energy towards Benjamin. It is like making a very small cut, like if I were human, removing a splinter. Focusing all my energy on grabbing a little portion and taking only that. It takes less energy than lighting a candle, but more focus than destroying a whole entire forest. Slowly, I warm my own hands. I go forward, putting them on Benjamin, thawing his skin.

"Careful now, Betha", Jasper whispers as he puts his hand on my shoulder. I'm not sure if focus is an emotion he can project, but the calm he is sending helps to keep my hand steady and my focus intact.

I feel Benjamin's skin thaw under where I am touching him, I move my hands to his chest. This would be easier if he were human. If I warmed his heart, the source of his blood, then the blood would do the work for me. I continue to move my hands. Soon, I go to his head and face. He is completely thawed.

"That is your true gift", he says when I am done. "If your freeze the ones who define time, then you freeze time itself. If you can extend this beyond one person, then you could be the most powerful person in the world", he says. I think about it, and I am stunned at how right he is.

Now the ice scares me. It has suddenly become the worse thing I can do, because it can leave me alone.

"Let's take a break, yeah?" I ask Benjamin. He nods his head once. He would never admit to it, but I can tell my freezing him is a sign. The student has surpassed the teacher. I laugh internally before Edward sends me a hard look. I know it means that I'm not done yet. God, he is such a _dad_. I roll my eyes, realizing a second too late that I am such a _teenager._

Edward laughs at me again. We all make our way into the living room. I am so relieved to be taking a break.

"Ok, someone explain this freezing thing to me in scientific terms because it's beginning to freak me out and I need some text book talk to calm me down", I say, naturally looking towards Carlisle.

"You control temperatures, so I thought it would be possible for you to freeze a human, but a vampire is totally different. I don't even think we comprehended the extent to which you can control temperatures. You obviously were able to lower the temperature around Benjamin's body to zero degrees Kelvin which means that not even the atoms that compose his body moved. Without that movement, he was unable to move as an organism. Lowering anything to that temperature is dangerous, and I'm not sure a human would live through, although since it stops all movement, you would probably be able to revive a human from the cold as well if you heated them fast enough to avoid hypothermia. Additionally, human cells are based more on water, so probably you could freeze parts of the body, rendering a human immobile. On the opposite end, you probably haven't even reached or comprehended your heat potential, but I don't know if anything exists lower than zero Kelvin. Some physicists theorize that attaining zero Kelvin on earth or anywhere besides outer space would be the same as stopping time, so Benjamin was right to say that essentially, you can control time", Carlisle finishes.

I understand what he is saying scientifically better than I thought I would. Being around the Cullens for only a few months has taught me a lot.

"So can I learn to control the cold the same way I did with the heat?" I ask eagerly.

"I don't see why not", Carlisle responds.

"Ok, let's go practice", I yelp, jumping out of my seat. My dad is holding a remote in his hand, and when he clicks play, the song "The Eye of the Tiger" bursts from the massive stereo system. I look at him instantly and smile. I can tell he is really proud of me for taming my ability, learning how to use it in a way that is constructive and doesn't kill everyone I know within a ten mile radius.

"Love the attitude", dad says as I jump out of my seat.

"I learned from the best", I smile back towards him. I'm putting on a brave face for him. I can't let anyone see my fear when it comes to the ability to freeze those around me.

Benjamin looks a little wary, but he agrees to go with me, coaxing some other people to come out with me. He wants others to be out there, to talk me through thawing him out again if it comes to that.

We work in the field far away from the house for a long time. I finally manage to freeze Benjamin a few times and thaw him out shortly afterwards. I ask if I can try to do more than one person at a time, and I quickly conquer that too. Soon, I can freeze everyone at once, and thaw them out collectively as well.

When everyone around me is frozen, I feel alone, I feel like I have frozen time. It is a scary feeling, but the fear makes the ice easier to conquer, easier to tame. I never thought that anger would be easier to control than fear, but apparently it is.

For a few more weeks, I work with Benjamin, every day. On a wonderfully cloudy Sunday, he deems me 'trained'. I'm surprised to learn that it took me nearly six months to be completely in control, but now, I don't have to think about controlling my emotions nearly as much. It comes so naturally. If I want to light a candle I just focus my eyes on the wick, if I wanted to kill a vampire, I could do the same. It takes so much less effort to get the same result now.

I talk to Bella a lot about learning to control our abilities. Alice and Edward's came very naturally, not being able to really be tested. Jasper's ability took some development, but under the threatening tutelage Maria, he learned quickly. Bella says that watching me work so hard is really amazing to see.

"Bella, how does extending your shield work and what does it do?" I ask one day when she and Edward are actually in the living room and not trying to remove each other's tonsils on the couch.

"It's like a rubber band, I can stretch it out and attach it to certain people, control the shape so that no special ability that penetrates the mind can get through it", she says while flipping through a magazine quickly.

"What do you mean 'special ability that penetrates the mind'?" I ask, curious about who that could be.

"Well, it doesn't include powers like yours or Jaspers, but it includes powers like Edward's, Jane's, Aro's", she says absentmindedly.

"Who are Jane and Aro?" I ask. I feel kind of dumb asking all these questions, but I can't help my natural curiosity. She focuses her yellow eyes on me instantly.

"You don't know?"

"No. Should I?"

"I—I thought someone would tell you who they are. It's strange that they wouldn't", she mumbles to herself. "Do you know who the Volturi are?"

"Who?"

"Ok, answers my questions. Um, hold on a second", she runs and is back in a second, holding a fancy, jewel encrusted box. "I guess I can tell you, I don't think anyone will be mad", she says, mostly to herself.

"The Volturi are the police for vampires in a way. They set all the rules that we have to follow, telling us what we can and cannot do. The person who leads the Volturi, unofficially in a way, is Aro. He can read thoughts with simply one touch." That sounds familiar to me, but I have no idea why. "He collects talented vampires too. He will have people join the Volturi who have special talents. He wants Alice to join, as well as Benjamin and I, and he would probably love to have you. By doing this, he creates a vampire police force that have more control than any other coven in our world. Jane is one of his favorite collections in a way. She can cause pain with just one look, and her brother, Alec, he can take away all senses."

"What?" I interrupt. Everything she is saying sounds eerily familiar.

"The two of them are used to weaken and disorient their enemies. Aro relies heavily on them, at least according to Edward. The Volturi have had a touchy relationship with our family for a long time. It sort of began when Carlisle went to live with them in the eighteenth century. Aro was intrigued that Carlisle didn't drink humans. Soon, it became a game for Aro, trying to get Carlisle to drink human blood. As you know, Carlisle never caved. Then, when I came around things began to get interesting", she laughs. I know her story because she and Edward insist on telling it to me every chance they get. They think it is some great romance, but after the eighth time of hearing it (and with permanent and perfect memory) I get a little bored. "First, we met them in Volterra. Edward promised to change me, so that he wouldn't be breaking the vampire laws. Some of them visited us in Forks when we fought Victoria's newborn army, and then they were angry with us again for me not being changed. Then, when Renesmee was mistaken for an immortal child, they all came, ready to annihilate us, but they eventually decided against it as we convinced them not to. Before my wedding to Edward, well the first one, Aro sent this gift. It has a huge diamond necklace in it, Alice can't even find anything for it to go with", my mouth drops a little at that, "and now", she sighs, "I really don't know where we stand with the Volturi." She finishes looking off into the distance.

Most of what she tells me sounds oddly familiar, but I just can't place it, especially what she tells me about Aro. I feel a connection to the Volturi, but I'm not sure I like the connection. I wish Bella and Edward a good night, although I'm pretty sure they will have one anyways without my well wishes, and go to my room. I grab a random book from my book shelf and plop myself on one of my extremely comfortable leather couches. I read, not really paying attention to what the book is saying, but gathering knowledge anyways. As I read, I flick one of the numerous candles on and off with my eyes blinking, then suddenly it hits me, and I am on my feet, pacing in my room, breathing heavy.

Aro is my _father. _Not my biological father because that would be strange, and he isn't my _dad_ at all, but he is my _creator. _He made me a vampire. And Jane and Alec were, at one time, the only friends I had, well at least I considered them friends, but they were really just torturing me, continuously non-stop. My breathing becomes even heavier. I'm lucky I'm not human, or else I would be on the floor, out cold right now. The bad thing about living in a house full of vampires is that everyone hears everything. Responding to my heavy breathing, my mum and dad knock on the door then enter my room (with their clothes and hair in a little more disarray than any teenager wants to see their parents in) and enter my room.

"Are you ok, honey?" mum asks, taking a seat on the couch as she watches me pace back and forth.

"No, I remember who my creator is", I scream, more than slightly hysterical.

"Oh, honey, it doesn't matter" she coos.

"Doesn't matter? Doesn't matter? My creator is the exact person who tries to destroy this family about once every two hundred years. He is the most hated person in the vampire world I think!" I shout back to her. The looks on their faces change from concerned to a little shocked. "My creator is Aro", I end as I flop back onto the couch in between the two of them.

"Are you sure?" dad asks me.

"One hundred percent", I respond miserably. "And Jane and Alec were told to guard me, but they ended up torturing me until I escaped onto that boat." I add for good measure. Mum is instantly hugging me, clutching me almost too tight to her chest. I can sense that she is giving dad a wary look over my head. "He's going to come back for me, isn't he", I cry even more miserably.

I feel it in the pit of my stomach. I am too much of a prize to just let walk away. He is probably already searching for me.

"We won't let that happen" dad says. I believe him, but that doesn't stop me from being nervous. All in all, two vampires and a vampire kid who just happens to be able to light other vampires on fire aren't going to stand up too well to the reigning king of the vampire world.

"But he is still going to come to find me. It is going to put everyone I love in danger", I wail. I realize I crossed the hysterical line a long time ago and now I am sprinting to the point where, if Carlisle could, he would knock me out. "Think about it, I'm the ultimate prize. Jane and Alec are nothing compared to me. This is awful. This is no good, I can't believe this is going to happen to me", I'm breathing even faster now. Nothing mum or dad could say to me will make me feel better. My life will be taken away from me, everyone I love will defend me until they are killed. Freedom is no longer an option for me.

"Betha, calm down. Aro will not find us. Rumor has it that Demetri has left him and without Demetri, Aro will be hard pressed to find you, I promise. And even if he does, the whole family will stand with us, and with Bella, neither Jane nor Alec will be able to touch you. Without his favorite pawns, he will be just another old guy that we can take down with our eyes closed. Aro will not take you away from us", dad says forcefully. I smile weakly at him.

His assurances don't help the major issue. I. Am. Furious. Lately, the age thing has been bothering me, but now, knowing that it was Aro, some sort of collector in the vampire world, did it just to have my abilities makes me pissed off. How dare someone take my life away, my choices away, just so they can claim me as some super vamp who can torch the heads off a bunch of other vamps.

Suddenly, I change my mind. I _want_ Aro to come find me so I can kill him, burn him up so that he's hotter than the sun, and burn him until he is just the ashes that he deserves to be. I'm done and I'm trained; I don't have to take crap from anyone anymore. I'm not a kid; I'm a force of nature that no one wants to be on the wrong side of, especially some old fart of a vampire.


	9. A Different Peace

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight.

a/n: Hope you enjoy this chapter, get to delve in a little bit of romance for Betha. I also hope you see that she is really developing a personality (and a strong one at that) since she left the devastating influence of the Volturi.

**Betha**

**A Different Peace **

I'm in the kitchen, sitting on the counter watching everything go on around me. It has been weeks since I came to the revelation that I am the creation of the most feared vampire in the vampire world. Calm has settled over the house. There is no need for dad and Carlisle to research my past any longer; I'm just expected to come to terms with what happened to me on my own. Everything has returned to normal for the most part.

"Esme, the pack is coming to visit and I thought we could have some sort of barbeque or something, if that wouldn't be too hard", Jacob says while munching on a carrot.

"Your what?" I ask because I'm not exactly sure what I just heard.

"My pack, my wolf pack—didn't anyone tell you? But, I guess you are Rose's daughter", he laughs. I glare at him a little, but then I give him a curious, silently encouraging him to continue.

"Well, I'm kind of the alpha of the pack, there are five of us, and you will meet them all. I think they will like you, you do what we do only with a whole lot less effort", he finishes. I'm satisfied with his answer.

"Sure, if you help me cook", Esme laughs.

"Leah is still coming to visit?" Nessie asks as she plops on the kitchen table bench next to Jacob, curling easily into his shoulder. She doesn't sound apprehensive, but she can't hide it from her eyes.

"Yeah, Seth is forcing her to. She's a lot better Ness, in some sort of happier place or something. I don't know, maybe she just finally discovered the benefits of narcotics", he laughs. I'm more interested now because these people sound interesting.

For the past few months, ever since Benjamin left and Nessie and Jake returned home, I have been so bored. I'm finally allowed to hunt outside the house, but that's it. Otherwise, I stay and home and hang out with the same people all day long. It is boring and it gives me too much time to think about what Aro did to me. I talk to mum, about how Alec and Jane were charged with teaching me how to learn, and how Aro used me as some sort of capital punishment for other vampires. We haven't talked about school at all, and I don't think it is going to happen while we are staying in Connecticut, but maybe the next place we stay I can try to go to school.

But for now, every single day is boringly the same. In the morning, Alice dresses me and plays with my hair, without fail making me look my real age instead of the biological one that I am frozen at. Then, I sit with Jake and Nessie while they eat breakfast, chatting casually with them. Then, I usually play video games with dad, and then we sit with Nessie and Jake to have lunch. Usually in the afternoon, the whole family will play some physical game outside, like football or baseball. Of course these are American sports so everyone is better than me. I don't join Nessie and Jake for dinner like I do the rest of the meals. I instead go to my room and read or play with my candles. Nights are lonely for me, but then everything starts in the mornings again.

The monotony of my life is driving me stir crazy. Any excitement in the house is worth becoming fully involved in, so for the next few days, the pack's barbeque is my number one responsibility. It is kind of strange to be helping to set up a party for people who I don't know, but it is exhilarating also.

I am intently curious about the werewolves. Jake is getting really frustrated with me because I am asking endless questions. So far, I have gathered Embry and Quil are Jake's best friends from when he was a kid. Leah and Seth are siblings. Ness told me that Leah is hard to get along with sometimes and that she might bite my head off. When you live with vampires and werewolves, you take a warning like that seriously. All the members of Jake's tribe still phase. Quil is waiting for his imprint Claire to grow up, and Embry, Seth, and Leah continue to phase. Maybe they are holding out for an imprint or maybe they just like being supernatural creatures; I didn't delve too far into the psychology of being a werewolf.

Even though Jake puts up a façade of being annoyed by my questions, I could tell that they are welcomed. Whenever I got really into asking questions, the family would roll their eyes, because apparently they have heard all the stories a lot. Mum keeps poking fun at me, claiming I get this weird appreciation for werewolves from dad and that she has nothing to do with it.

"Oh, Blondie, you know you love me deep down, don't you", Jake replies. Mum's face is so obviously stating 'no' that I can't help but laugh.

On the day of the pack's arrival, Alice comes into my room and gets me dressed. She hands me a pair of khaki shorts, a white button down shirt with the sleeves rolled to my elbows and nude, pinkish flats that are nicer than flip flops. She pins my hair up and puts a fake daisy into the bun at the back of my head. She shoves a mascara wand at my face, and I begrudgingly put it on.

I'm a little nervous to meet new people, but the excitement far outweighs any nerves. Alice forces eyeliner around my very golden eyes and then we hear the doorbell ring. Oh, how I love that doorbell, every time it rings it brings things for me to do. I would have a love affair with the doorbell if I could. Ugh, I'm so bored.

Jacob beats anyone to the door and swings it wide open. "Hey", he shouts. And suddenly there is a group of five tall, dark people. They look oddly the same, yet clearly different as well. All of them are taller than me, as is the norm.

I recognize each one, Nessie was grateful enough to show them to me using her ability, so it is not difficult for me to recognize them.

The shortest of them all, although still about eight inches taller than me, is Leah. She is stunningly beautiful, not in the vampire way, but in a very natural looking way with high cheekbones and brown eyes framed with dark thick eyelashes. Her hair is black and shiny, only a couple centimeters longer than Alice's pixie.

Embry is tall and slim, but shorter than Jacob. Everyone is shorter than Jacob. He has the same dark warm skin and short black hair as all the other boys.

Quil is shorter, probably just barely over six feet. He is the most muscular of the boys standing in the doorway.

Seth is tall, just barely six feet. He looks practically like Jacob's little brother with a boyish expression and a smile. He is the first to enter the house. To my shock, he shakes Edwards hand first, and then goes to Jake.

As per usual with new guests, I stay in the back. Mum is noticeably absent from the welcoming party. She comes up to stand next to me. "The house is going to smell for a week, now", she mumbles to me.

I look to her curiously. "It doesn't smell that bad, just a little woodsy. Like when it rains and its warm and everything smells like mildew", I reply, looking up at her. She looks at me like I've gone crazy and rolls her eyes. I ignore it. She is my mum and I love her to death, but that doesn't mean I have to agree with everything she thinks. Dad is shaking hands with Seth, and I hear him mention my name. I move up when dad beckons me with his hand.

"Here she is, all five foot two of spitball fire", he laughs. I'm suddenly a little shy, but not really.

"Hey", he says as he sticks his hand out to me. I extend my hand, but not before I warm it. I've touched Jake before, and I hate the way that his hot skin feels when mine is cold, so I've taken to warming my temperature up when I'm around him, so being around these wolves I just do it naturally. When I shake his hand, he seems a little shocked.

"Yes, she does that. She doesn't like to touch your skin when she's cold", I hear Edward reply to Seth's non verbalized question.

Seth looks at me. "That is so cool" he says loudly.

"Ha ha, thanks", I reply.

"You don't smell too bad either", he says. I hear Leah grumble in the background as she hugs Jake and Nessie.

"Um, thanks, I think", I reply, looking up at him warily.

"No, I mean it. Get over here, Embry and tell me the same thing", Seth says as he beckons Embry over.

I'm introduced to Embry and I'm shaking his hand. He sniffs the air carefully. "No, you're right. Not so sweet, more like fire and brimstone", he says. I can see him trying to work it out in his head.

"I smell like purgatory?" I ask.

"I've never really thought about it, but they're right. You don't really smell like the rest of us, it is ashy and icy, more like your talents that the normal vampire scent", Edward tells me. Explaining what is going on in the werewolves mind.

"Hmm, that's strange" I mumble. It doesn't really surprise me, what isn't related to my talents.

Eventually we all move to the large patio in the backyard. Esme sets up a wonderful barbeque with tasty ribs and burgers that have been sitting in various sauces all day. Nessie husks the corn while sitting next to Jacob with Seth and Quil in front of her. Everyone is laughing and having a great time. I'm helping Esme with the open fire to cook the meat. Like usual, my better control proves to be a more effective method than human made tools.

I'll admit that I'm not all at the party. My mind is a million other places: the way I smell, who my creator is, the fact that I look at least two years younger than everyone in the house. . . It's a little frustrating to be able to think about all of this at once.

"Betha, no!" I hear Esme say to me. I look down and see that I burnt one of the ribs really bad.

"Oh, I'm so sorry Esme", I say. I don't know how to fix it so I just stand back awkwardly as she takes the charred meat off its kabob and puts it into the trashcan. I light the fire in the fire pit so she can still cook and tell her I'm going to go take a break. I go to my room, I hear mum following me, but decide not to acknowledge her.

"Are you okay sweetie", mum asks as she follows me into my room.

"Yeah, just a little overwhelmed with everything, you know", I mumble.

"I understand, but you don't need to worry about anything. You are here and safe with us, your family. We won't let anything happen to you", she says, holding my chin up so I'm looking right into her eyes. "And you know that. What is really bothering you?" she asks as understanding clouds her features.

"I don't know how to explain it to you, or anyone", I say.

"Try me", she smiles encouragingly.

"Ugh. Everyone is so happy" I finally burst.

"Happy?"

"Yes, happy and paired up, looking like young twenty somethings having the times of their lives. I look like I'm about to start high school and want to go to a Justin Bieber concert", I groan.

"It's the age thing again", mum says. "I know it bothers you honey, but it really doesn't bother anyone else. To the vampire world, you are powerful, and your age doesn't matter. The only place your age matters is in your head. I know it's difficult for you to understand right now, but we don't see you as you see yourself. We see you as almost an adult. You have nearly eighteen years under your belt, we see you as being that, not when you were changed", she concludes.

"I guess I just have to learn to deal with that", I say as I hug her.

"Yes, you will, but, like I always know, you will be fine", she says as she hugs be back tighter.

I smile and get up from the couch in my room. "I'm going to go back out to the barbeque", I say. She smiles at me and we both stand up, making our way back to the patio.

Mum's right. Technically, I am older than Nessie, but she is the one who can sit with Jacob, living the dream. I have every right to be acting and treated the same way. I go over and join Nessie and Jake and the other werewolves. Confidence boils through my veins. Nessie smiles at me.

"The human stove finally decided to take a break and come joins us", she laughs. I briefly consider the possibility that she might be drunk, or at least buzzed. There are a lot of beer bottles around and I don't know if she can get drunk or not.

"Ha, ha, no Esme fired me because I burnt one of the ribs", I laugh back.

"Oh no, not one of the ribs!" Seth mocks shock at the possible loss of food.

"Hey, don't worry there is more than enough for everyone to eat without me going all pyro on it", I tease back.

"There is never enough for him to eat", Jake says solemnly. We all erupt in laughter.

The night goes wonderfully. The wolves and even Nessie consume massive amounts of food. Everyone obviously has a good time, even Leah manages to seem like she is enjoying herself. The pack had taken a plane to Connecticut, and they plan to stay for a few days, to catch up on everything with Jake and Ness and the rest of the family. Esme loves having the pack here because she gets to cook all day. The next night is just the same as the last, except with fish this time.

To my surprise, Leah sits beside me tonight on the patio. She's holding a beer, her sixth, in her hand.

"You know, my lunatic brother's right", she tells me.

"Yeah, how?" I reply.

"You don't smell that bad. Ashy, so it blurs out the sickly sweet smell", she mutters as she rolls the bottle in her hand.

"Thanks, I think", I reply.

"Yeah, no problem", Leah says back. I'm a little cautious now, because I don't know why she would be talking to me. "Where are you from, your accent is a little strange?"

"Oh, I was born in Scotland, but I was changed by the Volturi in Italy so, yeah", I finish awkwardly.

She nods her slowly "I've always wanted to go to Scotland", she says.

"Yeah, it's nice, at least what I remember. Are you ever going to go?" I ask.

"Yeah, absolutely. Actually, when our parents go married, Bella offered Seth and I a gift, as like a 'sorry I'm a vampire, but welcome to the family' kind of thing, and she offered me open plane tickets that I still have", she says continuing to roll the beer bottle in her hands. She has a faraway look and I'm beginning to get concerned, but then I register what she just said.

"You and Bella are related!" I say loudly.

"Yeah, step sisters, so Nessie is like my niece, I think, Seth's too. A little bit of Jerry Springer for the Quileute wolf pack for you", she says, laughing.

"Uh huh", I say. I honestly didn't know that werewolves could get drunk like this. She begins to slump over, falling asleep. I catch her easily, warming my skin barely when I touch her.

"Leah!" Seth says as he takes the beer bottle away from his sister and walks over to us. "Sorry", he says to me, looking sympathetically. "She wasn't being cruel was she? She does that sometimes", he mumbles to me. "She only gets like this about once a year, when she comes here and sees how well the other half of the family is doing", he rambles on and on.

"No, she was fine, let's take her to a room", I say. It all seems so familiar to me in a very dim, strange way.

"Ok, tell me where to go", Seth smiles to me slightly as he picks his sister up in the fireman's carry.

We go in through the door to my bedroom. "How about the couch? This is my room so it will be quiet", I say. He nods his head and lays his sister on one of the white couches. I run out of the room at full speed and am back with a bucket that I put by her face.

"You're good at this", he says.

"Both my parents were drunks", I reply looking at Leah.

She sits up and vomits into the bucket. I kneel next to her and put my hand on her forehead, making her skin cool down. "Thanks", she mutters as she looks up at me.

"No problem", I reply.

"Leah, you going to be ok in here, just want to sleep it off?" Seth asks. She nods her head as she vomits into the bucket again. Seth looks at me and I follow him out of the room, back out to the patio.

"So your temperature thing works the other way too?" he asks smiling at me once we sit down on the patio seat.

"Yeah. I can control any temperature, making them go through a really wide range. I can freeze things in place, and I can set the air on fire", I say, watching his eyes. It's a little scary to admit that you can kill people in just casual conversation.

"So, that means you can destroy vampires?" he asks cautiously as he puts the pieces together.

"Yeah" I reply curtly.

"That is so freakin cool. You're like a werewolf, but turbo charged!" he replies, sticking his hand up for a high five. I laugh with him. We talk for the rest of the night, until he gets tired and decides to crash in my room with his sister. I notice my mum looking at me warily a lot, but I ignore it. I can't help but remember the point that Seth makes. I destroy my own kind, so isn't my perfect match someone who destroys the same thing I am?


	10. A Teenager And A Mind Reader Don't Mix

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight.

a/n: Double digit chapters, woo hoo! I am so excited to reach so many milestones with this story. I hope you enjoy this chapter, and I might be going out on a limb here, but still, hope you enjoy and please review.

**Betha**

**A Mind Reader And A Teenager Don't Mix**

The wolves stay for much longer than expected, which is in a strange way, accepted. After Leah's night of shame, as Seth jokingly dubs it, he and I get along swimmingly. The whole house is a wonderful atmosphere. Despite the clear genetic differences, everyone seems to be getting along great. Even Leah doesn't seem as down and out as she usually is.

An hour after a very intense game of Taboo against teams of Jasper and Nessie, and Esme and Edward, Seth and I (who were a team which was extremely unfair because Edward could read Esme's mind and Nessie could send Jasper thoughts if they touched hands under the table, so of course we lost miserably) chat on the couch, watching my dad and Embry play some sort of hilarious dancing game on the Wii.

"I really can't get over that you are Bella's brother, it is so weird", I say to him.

"Yeah, I really try to not think about who is related to who in situations like mine. When I really think about, there had to be a lot of cousins sleeping together to result in the weird werewolf line that is going on right now in Forks", he laughs. He is so easy going and manages to make a joke out of everything. If I didn't know that Jasper is the one with the mood controlling abilities, I would argue that Seth is solely responsible for the universal good mood raging through the house constantly.

"Ugh, I don't want to think about that either", I laugh back.

"Hey there not your cousins", he retorts continuing to laugh. We both smile at each other. "Hey, I almost forgot, what is going on tonight?" he asks. I know, well at least I think, he should know the answer.

"Everyone is going out to that restaurant in the city for a 'good bye' meal kind of thing", I say back.

"Why aren't you going?" he asks, raising on eyebrow easily.

"Because everyone is afraid that I am going to accidentally eat our maître de, and if I make it past her, then of course I'm going to eat the waiter", I say, suddenly focusing intently on the TV and the game proceeding on it.

"So we are supposed to leave you home alone while we all go out?" he says, letting the other eyebrow follow its twin on his forehead.

I shrug my shoulders. "I might burn the house down if I get bored", I mumble.

He laughs, but a serious look returns to his face quickly. "I'm not going if you can't", he says suddenly. I see dad's eyes roll towards me from the game, but I don't acknowledge his acknowledgment.

"You should go, it's for you and your pack, and it's not a dinner for us Cullens. We don't even eat for God's sake", I try to convince him.

"You know I don't see divisions between the pack and Cullens, You're a person in the group, just like I'm a person in the group, and if you can't go then, I won't go", he states defiantly. I take an unnecessary sigh and shake my head yes. He is stubborn, perhaps (at least according to Bella) the only trait he gets from his mother.

When everyone leaves for dinner, the driveway becomes a colossal exodus of a bunch of hundred thousand dollar cars, and with all the mixing up of who rides where, no one realizes that Seth and I are absent. We turn and grin at each other as we realize we have the whole house to ourselves and that our childish plan worked effortlessly.

"Ok, you have to show me everything you can do. I want to see you freeze something in place", he whines like a little kid.

"If I freeze you in place, you won't be able to see", I reply, laughing at his eagerness.

"Baby, I'm too hot to freeze", he says in a really cheesy voice. We both erupt in laughter. "Ok, let's just watch some TV then. I really don't want to lose any of my senses, you might take advantage of me", he laughs again. I send him a fierce threatening look and lick my lips, we laugh even harder.

We go to the couch. I go to our movie collection and beginning throwing possible options at Seth which he catches easily. He chooses one and puts it into the DVD player. I plop down on the couch next to him, and we begin to mindlessly watch the movie. I can't help sneaking looks at Seth as we watch the movie.

I know the thoughts that are running through my head, even though I've never felt them before. He's a good looking guy who isn't scared away by my ability to kill him with one look. He smiles as me as I continue to look at him quizzically, but his face doesn't change. Perhaps he knows that I am watching him, but he's too nice to acknowledge my complete disrespect.

I begin to imagine a scale. On one side is my mum, and on the other is Seth. Mom is lecturing me about how werewolves smell, how they are furry and gross and how they are all major mooches. Then there's Seth on the other side who is smiling and not saying anything about how bad vampires are because he doesn't think they are bad.

Dad has been teaching me a lot of American history so that when I do go to school, I'm not a complete numbskull. We just reached the civil rights movement of the sixties and I can't help thinking that if I was stuck between mum and Seth, mum would be Malcolm X and Seth would be Martin Luther King. Would I be crazy to not choose MLK?

Moving at the supernatural speed that my being a vampire gave me, I jump on Seth, straddling him as he sits on the couch. He doesn't hesitate to respond. I feel my body heating up, but I'm not focusing on controlling my temperature right now. I'm just focusing on Seth's tongue reaching into my throat and mine battling his right back. My temperature is hot, but it's about the same temperature as Seth's is naturally, and are bodies work together like one.

He pulls away and looks me in the eye. "Neither of us is every going to hear the end of this", he says as he stares me down.

"I don't give a fuck", I reply. He lets out an animalistic growl and stands up, I'm still connected to his hips so I wrap my legs around. We go up the steps and go into the nearest bedroom which I dully notice is not mine or a guest room. I don't even register whose room it is.

We lie down on the large king bed and our clothes are being torn off. The indiscernible articles are thrown into a pile on the floor, no more than rags. His hands are all over my supernaturally warm body, and mine his.

I never had sex in my human life, so what I am experiencing has no comparison. Our bodies fit together with a strange, unnatural connection. The danger contributes to the sexual tension between us. We shouldn't be doing this, every fiber of both our beings tells us that, but it feels so right, at a time when both of us need it so bad.

We are both so absorbed in what we are doing, fittingly, that we don't hear the front doors open and our respective families return. We don't hear Edward give a little gasp, and we don't hear Alice and Jasper open the door to their bedroom. But both of us certainly hear Alice's comment:

"What the hell do you two think you are doing?"

XXX

Seth and I sit on the couch. He is wearing the sheet from Alice and Jasper's bed. I am wearing the robe from Alice's bathroom that she threw at me after she found us. Mum and Leah are for once united, glaring at us both with equally evil stares. I don't think it makes either of us happy to see them working together on this one. One tough broad's evil stare is enough, two means you aren't going to live for much longer.

My family's faces are hard to register. Dad is looking back and forth between mum and I, clearly at a loss as to what to do in a situation like this. Alice and Jasper seem to be too grossed out to have a normal reaction, which is completely understandable. Carlisle and Esme looks are those that I try to avoid because their disappointment is thick in the air. Bella is looking at me with a shocked look. I think she is surprised I have the kahunas to do something so blatantly _wrong_. Edward seems to be undergoing a mini episode with all the emotions and thoughts and X-rated pictures running through his head. Nessie looks at me with a confused look, a one which all the wolves seem to share as well.

"I just don't understand what would ever possess you to do something so unbelievably stupid", Mum finally screams at me.

"I don't understand how you two can even be attracted to each other; you are natural enemies for god's sake", Leah shouts, shooting daggers at Seth.

"Leah, we know from experience that we aren't exactly natural enemies—" Jacob starts.

"Black, I don't want to hear it. Whatever you have going on is totally different because my brother was just caught hooking up with a _full blooded_ vampire", Leah screams at her Alpha. Her hands are shaking violently as well as her whole body.

"Dog, this is totally not your business. You just need to stay there with my niece and stay out of my way when it comes to parenting", Mum ordered, moving to stand even closer to Leah so that she could more effectively stare me down. Leah continues to shake.

"Leah, maybe you should go outside and run for a little bit—" Seth starts.

"Don't you dare tell me what to do! I am the older sister, and I am going to tell you how we are going to handle this situation" Leah screams back at Seth. Then she gets a traitorous look in her face. "And I am going to call mom. She is going to just love this. Her twenty year old son hooking up with a fifteen year old!" Leah responds as she whips out her cell phone and begins to dial numbers furiously.

"I am not fifteen!" I screech back at Leah. "I am not fifteen, I am eighteen for God's sake which means I have both the mental capacity and the maturity to make my own decisions concerning sex, goddammit! It means I'm an adult" This is the first thing that I have said all night since my initial expletive when we were caught by my aunt and uncle.

"No, you are not as mature as an adult, you never will be. If you were, you would know that you can't mix the supernatural. You don't have the responsibility or the mental capacity to do something like this, to take on a relationship like this. You are a child", mum screamed at me.

I stand to my feet, and I am furious. "How dare you? How dare you? You are the only one who has ever stood up for me, who has ever told me that I'm not the age that I was turned, that I am mature. This is me making my own decision, this is me taking a chance!" I scream back. My hands are the ones shaking now, and I feel myself losing control on my emotions. I have never been so betrayed, so furious in my life.

Dad comes from around mum. "Betha, calm down. We can settle this calmly and rationally" he holds his hands up, showing them to me in a sign of peace. You know it's bad when my dad starts recommending peace. I realize I am scaring my family, but I don't care at the moment. I just want to run, escape, and let my emotions go.

So I do just that. I'm already on my feet, but very suddenly, a split decision, I turn and run. I know where there is a lake close to the property. I run as fast as I can to the lake. It is a few miles away, and it takes me only seconds to get there.

I throw off the robe Alice loaned me, not wanting to burn it. I'm naked in the middle of the night at the bank of the lake. I jump into the water and swim as fast as I can to the center of the lake. Once there, I focus on all my anger and the water around me begins to boil. If I were human, I would be scalding, my flesh would be melting off my bones at this second, but I'm not human, I'm indestructible, and the scalding water does not even hurt me. The bubbles of air extend far on the large lake, I can see as easily at night as I can during the day. The heat reaches the sand, the largest heat circle I have ever created. I finally cool down, literally and figuratively. But a sadness and remorse envelope me, and the water begins to freeze, freezing me into place at the center of the water. The lake soon freezes solid; I push myself up out of the water and stand atop the glistening lake. I see a figure standing off at the end of the lake. It is a light colored wolf and I recognize it immediately as Seth. I run over the ice, maneuvering it just as easily as if it were land. Seth is beginning to phase as I reach the frozen bank.

We are both naked in the cool night air of a Connecticut summer. "Are you ok?" he asks me warily.

"Well, except for nearly killing my own mum and running out on my own family, I'm fine", I mumble morosely. Seth pulls me in for a hug. Both our ears are extra sensitive at the moment. "Edward's coming", I mumble into Seth's shoulder.

I grab the robe which is a few feet away from the part of the bank where we are standing. Seth has nothing, so he just stands behind me. I feel his support and my mind is reeling. I can't go home. Not after what I said, not after how I was treated. Maybe, with Seth's strong support, I don't have to go home.

"I know what you're thinking", Edward says somberly as he appears from the trees. He is staring directly at me.

"Tell me something I don't know", I retort, knowing I am being smart.

"You can come back. Rose gets mad all the time, but she gets over it. She is already getting over it", Edward says. I know his mind games. Knowing everything that is going on around him makes him an excellent manipulator and liar. I can't really trust anything he says.

A look of sadness passes over Edward's face. But as soon as I notice it, it's gone. "I know", I lie through clenched teeth. I wish I could have the one privilege of being alone in my mind for just a little while. My lie falls useless across the hushed lakeshore. I need to be alone; I need to be away from the people I love because I am too much of a danger to them and myself. If I hurt one of them, I will hurt myself beyond repair as well.

"You're going to hurt your mother more by leaving", Edward says, slowly and calmly, like talking a suicidal kid off the edge.

"At least she will be _alive_", I hiss back at him. I'm stubborn, and Edward knows he has lost this fight. I almost forget that Seth is standing behind me.

"Leah is only so tough on you because she cares Seth, she doesn't want to see you hurt", Edward says. Seth squeezes my shoulder. Through that one insignificant touch, I get the feeling that he is willing to follow me anywhere. "Your whole pack cares about you, but Leah yells because she doesn't want you to make the same mistakes she did, she doesn't want you to be in any danger, whether the danger be for your body or your heart. She's mostly angry because she doesn't understand you, doesn't understand how you can so willingly trust us with everything", Edward says, using the same ridiculously calm voice.

"Edward, you may say that, but honestly man, you don't have to live with her", Seth says. I feel the pain roll from his voice. I remember what it is like living with drunks, living with people who are in so much emotional pain that they can't even care for themselves, so they take it all out on you. I remember what it is like to watch someone you love damage themselves over and over again.

Edward gives up the fight with Seth as easily as he gave up on me. He sighs once. "You are not going to get much of a head start, and you clearly own nothing but one piece of fabric in between the two of you and you are without money. Betha's never been around humans, so it's a free for all when you see how she will handle it., and the pack's mind connection is going to make getting away even harder", Edward advises. The advice is cold and unfeeling, like he knows we won't succeed but a small part of him still hopes that we do, because inside my head I want nothing more than a momentary glimpse at freedom. I nod once curtly at him. He runs back towards the direction of the house. I turn to Seth.

"We are going to do this?" I ask making direct eye contact.

"We are doing this", he replies strongly. I smile slightly back towards him.

"Ok, how about you phase and I will run next to you. We can hunt once we get far enough away. Hopefully the mixture of our scents will make us harder to find, although Edward already knows it", I say. Seth shakes his head in the affirmative. "Ok, let's go", I say.

"Um, what about the lake? Humans don't take kindly to ice skating in July", he says pointing at the water.

I laugh and put my hand on the edge of the bank. I focus on heating, and within seconds, the water is steaming lightly. I cool down, and the temperature goes back to what it would have been without my interference. Seth phases. I let him take lead so I will know when he gets tired. I begin to run behind him, looking behind me sadly several times.


	11. Everything Touch Seems to Go Bad

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight.

a/n: I'm going to leave Betha's POV for a while and branch off to some other characters. Hope you enjoy and I am so excited to get to a 1,000 hits for this story so a big thanks to those of you who are reading it.

**Betha**

**Everything I Touch Seems To Go Bad, I'm Freaking Midas**

_Rosalie_

It happens when the two people who you care about most in the world just pick up and decide to run away together. It happens when the other person has a direct mind connection to the two people who did run away together. So it makes sense that in an extremely strange truce, Leah and I become friends, or more so, two people who share the same goal and are willing to do _anything _to get it, even sit down and have a civilized conversation with each other.

After Betha ran out of the house after she yelled at me, Edward said he would follow them. He came back claiming that he couldn't find them, which I take to be a complete lie. Then, he got all 'I was once the parent of a teenager' and sent Nessie a pointed look, and told me that my best option would be to wait until she comes home.

Emmett had to hold me back from ripping out his throat. So of course, Bella tried to attack me after I tried to get at Edward, and the whole thing became ugly very fast. I managed to; once again, isolate myself from my whole family. They think I should just let her blow off some steam, of course I pointed out that for her to blow off steam usually involves the destruction of a whole entire flammable forest. Emmett said that he and Jasper would go look for her in the morning, when a girl running around in a bath robe and a giant wolf would be much easier to find. I told Emmett that he could plan on sleeping alone, for the next century.

So now, I find myself sitting next to the one person in the entire house who did not try to hold be back when I tried to kill Edward, who told me I should go after my daughter, and who has yet to tell me I'm wrong: Leah.

"Can't you phase to just make sure that they are both ok?" I ask her after we sit quietly for entirely too long of an awkward minute.

"No, stupid Jacob Black went all Alpha on me for the first fucking time ever and told me to give him some _space._ He doesn't need space, he needs a good foot in his ass, that boy does", she hisses. I have to give it to the girl, she is one tough ass broad.

"We can go kill Jake together, perhaps start with castration", I say as I go to stand up.

"The numbers are shitty", she huffs like she has already thought about. I think and see that she is right. No one in that damned house would be willing to help us, knowing my dog loving family, they'd probably stand against us. "I figure that waiting until morning is enough time and then I am going to phase and run my furry ass until I catch up with that leech lover brother of mine."

"Sounds great, as long as you take me with me, so I can give my daughter a whole new definition of on fire. She hasn't seen the least of the fire I can make", I say. Leah turns to me and grins. I grin straight back at her. Then her smile falls.

"I just don't understand why", she mumbles as she throws her head into her hands.

"Understand what?" I ask.

"Why the hell two completely different creatures would decide to hook up. I don't know why pixie leech over there isn't more worked up, I mean it was her bed" Leah continues to grumble.

"Because Alice doesn't get angry about anything. This is a perfect reason for her to go out and buy a new bed. She would have taken the downfall of the Greek Empire and turned it into a shopping trip if she had existed back then", I say, rolling my eyes.

Leah just stares at me and then starts laughing uncontrollably. I am slightly concerned that she will forget to breathe; I have a feeling that werewolves need to do that. Eventually she recovers. "If I had to choose a vampire for a partner in this shitty situation, I am damn glad that it is you", she says.

"Yeah, I'm glad it's you. You are the only one who isn't afraid to take crap from anybody, so you are perfect to deal with my daughter", I say back. I stick out my hand for her to shake it, and surprisingly enough she takes it, without flinching at the cold temperature. We grin manically as our truce is sealed with a hand shake.

XXX

The next morning, (Leah had to sleep, unfortunately) she and I plan an entire stakeout. She phases and tells me that both of them are ok, but hat Seth is refusing to tell her where they are. I feel my fury burning its way through my esophagus.

"He won't give me any information, and quite frankly, I think neither of them knows where they are going, they just want to get away", Leah says after she phases back and throws on her shorts and tank top.

"Well, of course they don't know where they are going, they are both _children_", I glare back at her. The look she gives me is slightly confused.

"They're not really kids, you know. It's not like neither of them can't take care of themselves, alone. They are supernatural creatures for god's sake, they aren't two young kids running away and trying to make it on their own", she finishes, continuing to look me straight in the eyes. God, this girl has guts.

I'm ready to yell at her, to tell her who wrong she is, but when I open my mouth, only an animalistic whimper comes out. "Leah, I swear to god, if I didn't know the year you were born, I would say that you were from the seventies, you're just a little to open minded, free love, and drugs for me", I choke out as I cry tearlessly.

To the surprise of both of us, Leah hugs me. I can tell she's trying not to touch my skin, just my clothes, and I hear her stop breathing, but the gesture is touching to say the least.

"I understand where you're coming from. She's your daughter, your only daughter. Adopted though she is, she is still yours. Trust me, I know what it's like to want a child more than anything, and I know in my heart, in my bones, that the two of them will come home. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but they _will _come home", she says, pulling out of the hug, still trying not to touch my skin.

I remember Edward telling me that Leah thinks she can't have kids. I look at her and see more of myself in her than anyone else I know. I'm more like my goddamn natural enemy than anyone else I know. And suddenly, I'm laughing. I put my hands on my knees so I can bend in half and continue to laugh. This is hilarious. Leah is looking at me like I'm crazy, which of course, I am. This is the funniest situation I have ever been in. Working with my enemy to find the person I love the most, and now my enemy for the longest time is _comforting_ me. Unbelievable.

Leah gives me one more look, and then she is laughing too. We sound like a pair of hyenas, and I hear in the back of my conscious, some of my family members coming down to the dining room and watching Leah and I go crazy. She turns to me.

"Let's get out of here. Go out for a drink, distract our minds a little", she says in between laughing.

"I can't drink", I say, continuing to laugh.

"Hell, I'll drink enough for both of us", she laughs back.

"Ok, we'll take my car", I say as I grab my keys from the hooks in the kitchen. She follows me to the garage. I can hear the silence (some not breathing) coming from the dining room. That just makes me laugh harder. We get into my older red convertible. I don't feel in the mood to be inconspicuous. Leah realizes she isn't' wearing any shoes, which makes both of us laugh harder. We jump out of the car and jog up to my and Em's room to get some shoes. I throw a mini black dress at her and a pair of heels. By some uncanny luck, we are both about the same size. I strip off my jeans and plaid shirt outfit. I exchange it for mini trouser shorts and a backless pinkish top. I slip into some nude colored heels and throw my long blonde hair into a ponytail.

"Let's go get our minds off these two crazy kids", I say. We walk back down to the car and get in. I pull out and drive away. I feel like such a rebellious teenager or a bad mom, I don't know which, but I do know I feel damn good. For weeks I have been taking care of Betha making sure that she doesn't hurt anyone, and, even though I really love her, the stress is beginning to drive me crazy. I just need to get away, go and let loose for a while.

It's amazing how therapeutic it is to watch someone else get totally wasted. Leah is partying up a storm. I don't even draw the line when she gets up to dance on the table, I join her. We completely let go, not worrying about anything. It feels great. After Leah throws up on some huge guy who she is dancing with, I decide that now would be a good time to go home. I gather her up, pay off her tab, and get back into the car.

Leah quickly crashes in the car. I turn off the headlights and drive quickly home. When I pull into the driveway and walk through the door, Jake and Emmett are waiting for me in the living room; I can hear everyone else talking extremely quietly in the kitchen.

"Did you kill her?" Jacob asks as he walks over to me and takes Leah from my arms. She wasn't heavy at all, so I shove him away and put her down on the couch that Jacob just vacated.

"No, we just had fun" I say back, sending him a hateful look. I don't forget that he defended Betha and Seth when they left.

"Fun? Honey, just this morning you and Leah were conspiring to go and capture Seth and Betha, and now you and her are out partying until all hours of the night", Emmett says, his gaze going from the clock on the mantle to Leah to me.

"Are you kidding me right now? My daughter just left, I have no way of finding her, and now you're yelling at me for trying to get away for a little bit. You are freaking insane!" I snarl at Emmett, keeping my voice low so that I don't wake Leah, even though I don't think a freight train could wake her up at the moment.

"Rose, I know this is hard for you, but this is not the way to deal with it", Emmett tells me calmly, like he is dealing with a fragile damaged good.

"I don't care. How are you handling it? Our daughter just ran out on us, if that isn't a testament to us being bad parents, then I don't know what is", I fire back at him.

"I really hope you don't mean that. I'm just as torn up about it, but Rose, she is old enough to leave, we can't stop her. She is an _adult_. We found her, we cared for, we did what we could to make the best person we could. You left to kill your fiancé, remember? Edward left to become some sort of vigilante, Alice and Jasper left to save us. We all leave at some point, just let her get it out of her system. I have faith that the way we raised her will give her no option but to come back to us. This is tearing me up inside, you've just been too concerned with trying to track her down to notice that I am just as upset as you are", Emmett says as he falls to the couch his head in his hands. I've hardly ever seen him upset, and this is the first time I've seen him cry tearless sobs.

Jacob stares between the two of us. "I'm just going to—um, go—um, Nessie? Are you calling me?" He shuffles out of the room quickly.

"Em, god, I just—I didn't notice", I mumble as I walk over to him and hug his bent over frame tightly. It feels weird to be comforting someone so much bigger than me, someone who, has countless times comforted _me._

"It's ok. I wanted to be there for you, but I certainly didn't expect you to turn to the she-wolf for help instead of me", he says with his head still in between his knees. "The thing I worry about most is that she sticks to our diet. I want that for her, I don't want her to feel guilty about killing someone. I don't want her to deal with the guilt that I have felt", he says as I rub my hands on his back. Emmett hates that being a vegetarian has been hard for him in the past. Not many things make him upset, but taking an innocent life is certainly something he doesn't want to revel in.

"I know honey. And like you said, we raised her right, she has to make her own decisions", I say, finally believing what I'm saying.

"She will come back to us Rose, there is no doubt in my mind about that", he says to me as he lifts his head up. The pain in his golden eyes is clear.

"I pray she will, I just have to keep faith", I say, as I look down. We embrace, hugging tightly and kissing each other like we are all the other has. For so long, it had been just the two of us, and my life had been whole, at least I though, until Betha came along. I knew I had always wanted a child, but I didn't know what it felt like to actually have one. When she came, she closed a whole in my heart that I didn't even know existed. And now with her gone again, Emmett's hugs feel like they are missing a third. Someone who should be in the middle just isn't there.

XXX

"The best things are the things you have to wait for." That was what Carlisle told me when I wanted to try to speed up the three days I had to wait for Emmett to change. That was what I told Betha one night when she was upset about never being able to find her significant other. That is what I tell myself every day that Betha is gone.

I decide to stop counting after the third month. I think if I would have gotten to a hundred days, I would have completely lost it.

Betha's absence has a profound effect on the whole family. Physically, we are different as well. Leah insisted on staying, knowing that her brother would, when the time came, take Betha home before he went anywhere without her. It is just the way he was raised to behave with women.

Embry decided to stay as well, but Quil went home to see Clare. Embry insists that he wants to be here for his pack, saying that if one member is missing, the rest should stick together. Leah tells me that Embry just doesn't want to be hanging out with Quil and witnessing the 'wonderful' magic of imprinting every day. I point out that Jake and Nessie's blissful happiness is sometimes vomit inducing, but Leah tells me that Embry just wants to be around her because she is one of the only other ones who hasn't imprinted.

I decide wolves are weird.

Esme and Carlisle act as if they have lost a grandchild, which in a way, they have. Carlisle is also, like Emmett, extremely worried that Betha will break the vegetarian diet and the power surge that could come from that. He doesn't want her to lose control at the wrong moment and set the Volturi on her, a fear which had yet to cross my mind. I was glad to find out later that Carlisle and Edward kept that little tidbit from Em and I. Leah, Jake, and Embry continuously assure Carlisle that Seth will try to stop her from feeding on any humans no matter what, and that from what they can tell with their brief conversations with Seth, she hasn't broken the rules yet.

Jasper walks around the house in a stupor. Edward keeps telling Emmett and me to lighten up, if not for our own sakes, then for Jasper's. I don't care, I've never been one to listen to Edward, but when Jasper is close, I do try to focus on something else, which isn't always easy.

Alice, my sweet little sister Alice, is trying to see Betha whatever chance she can get, but because right now, her immediate future is tied so closely with Seth, she can hardly ever see her. The poor girl suffers headaches nearly constantly, and I have not the slightest idea how to ever thank her or how to help her now.

Bella, as the only other fellow mother in the house, tries to comfort me any way she can. Nessie never ran away, although the day swiftly approaches when Nessie will leave the nest to live with Jacob. Bella knows this and tries her best to emphasize with me, but I know it is difficult for her to do. So I try not to force this mental pain too much on my other sister.

The house is torture to live in. I find myself more and more, taking Emmett out to the lake and just sitting and watching everything that goes on around me. I can't even bring myself to work on my cars, something that use to bring me such pleasure. I can't stand being happy with the possibility that my daughter is not. I can't help feeling jealous of Leah. She has a direct connection to Seth's thoughts and feelings; I have nothing, no phone call, no letter. The only thing that keeps Em and I going is our faith in our ability to raise a kid. I can only pray, so pray I will until my heart comes back to me.


	12. A Lost Jewel

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight.

a/n: This is going to be a shorter chapter, but it is really important to the plot, hope you enjoy and please review.

**Betha**

**The Lost Jewel**

_Aro_

I sit in my throne in my chamber, quietly humming to myself, patiently waiting for Heidi to return with the latest catch. I feign peace and contentment, but I cannot deny the inner turmoil that is running through my bloodless veins. The government which I have strived for thousands of years to build up is becoming to crumble. The decadence of my dynasty can be summed up in one name: Betha.

I cannot help blaming myself for the downfall as well. I never should have changed such an emotional being, I should have waiting to change her until she would be better able to exercise control over her powers. I should have doted on her first, when she was but a mere human, then my new vampire would have been loving towards me and there would have been no need for torture. But alas, once again I let my heedless pursuit of power cloud my judgment which resulted in the death of Chelsea, the destruction of the single greatest bond which was the very cause for the existence of the Volturi.

Heidi is late and I wonder what is holding her back. I pray that she, like several others, did not choose to leave us as well.

I recount the various losses that I have suffered within the last few months. The most damning blow was Marcus's departure. The whole ideal of the Volturi is based on the absolute reign of my brothers and I, without him here, our image is greatly tarnished. It is one thing to lose a member of the guard, quite another to lose a fellow leader. Then others began to leave, unimportant though they were, it was still a blow.

I don't measure my strength in numbers; I measure it in power, as any great leader should. While in terms of power, I am still stronger than any coven, the physical diminishing of numbers is somewhat alarming. If I were to lose Jane or Alec, I have no clue what I would do.

Thinking about the twins forces my mind to return once again to the biggest matter at hand: _Betha._ I never should have let her out of my sight. I flash back to the moment when I dismissed her; it is forever engrained in my memory because it was one of the few times I actually lost my temper. My anger clearly clouded my decision to dismiss her. It was inexcusable to actually force out my most valuable player. I need her back, among my collection. I feel intrinsically that Betha, Jane, and Alec are a set. They belong together, and whoever possesses the trio is invincible. I fear most now whose hands she has fallen into. She was just too easy of a target for any coven to pick up. Her black eyes and strangely unique scent would be enough for any vampire to investigate, and if she didn't kill the vampire who found her, then she would now be under to guidance of any number of power seeking covens.

"Heidi has returned and with a treat", says Demetrius as he walks through the door, preceding Heidi's elegantly beautiful form. Following her is the usual collection of humans, these ones are most likely American. I don't care what I eat, as long as I am fed. I permit Heidi to care for all things pertaining to the collection of humans. But tonight, there is more than just humans following her, three vampires take up the very rear of the group.

"Aro, my friend", says an extremely tall female with a slight Irish accent. "We were visiting the city, just running through. We certainly did not mean to disturb you", she said. I notice a slight tremble in her voice and recognize her immediately. She stood as one of Carlisle's witnesses when my brothers and I first discovered the existence of vampire-human hybrids. Her mate and another female with red curls stand by her side.

"Of course, of course. This is nothing but a friendly formality. Any vampire who enters our vicinity must stop by for a visit. Simple, common curtsey, my dear" I say as I rise from my chair and step forward to shake her hand. She hesitates initially, wary of my ability to read her innermost thoughts, but with a shrug of the shoulders from the tiny red headed female, she takes my hand willing.

I shut my eyes instinctually as the overflow of information flies into my mind. After so many years, the feeling is comforting. Suddenly, my mind fixates on one memory, from only a few months ago. Immediately, the stakes for these visitors are determinate entirely on what information they will be able to provide. I release her hand.

"You still communicate with Carlisle", I say. It is a question and a statement in itself, there is no lying to me.

"Yes", the large female replies morosely.

"He told you to be on the lookout for someone, please explain", I say in a cold commanding voice. The large female turns to red headed one again, who gives her another shrug of the shoulder.

"Yes, he seems to have lost his granddaughter, or rather she has run away", she says.

"And who is this child of our kind" I ask, although I already know her name.

"Betha. She is special, like you and Maggie here. Apparently she can—she can shoot manipulate the temperature surrounding her", she continues to say her face falling with every statement.

"Hmm, you do realize my dear, that Betha neither is nor will ever be Carlisle's to claim. I am her creator, if she belongs to anyone, it is to me", I say with a timbre of command to my voice.

"I will relay the message to Carlisle if you wish, my friend" the large woman said shrinking back attempting to seek solace from her.

She leaves quickly. I am much too shocked to send anyone after her and her coven. I turn to Caius. He watches me apprehensively. "I know what you are thinking Aro, and I don't believe that it is truly worth the trouble" he says shooting me a knowing look.

"What do you mean 'not worth the trouble' brother, she is the one of the most powerful vampires whom I have ever come across and she has been out of my hands for more than a year. If Carlisle's coven possesses her, then his family could undoubtedly become more powerful than us", I say back, penetrating his mind with my gaze.

"I know you will do what you want anyways, but perhaps you should think about our already damaged reputation before you illicit another attack on the Cullen family" he says, raising an eyebrow.

I briefly consider what he tells me, but I decide it isn't worth my time. Betha is a key piece in our reinstatement to the top of the vampire world. If we have her, we have everything in our hands.

I gather Demetrius and tell him that we will begin a search for the Cullen clan. I find Jane and Alec and tell them to prepare for a trip.

I am going, although I strongly believe that Caius will choose to not go with me, this expedition is purely for information. Caius has largely lost interest in the goings on of the Volturi as of late, a fact which has begun to worry me.

I prepare to acquire my gem again, my jewel for my collection. She will be the shining glory.


	13. When You Need A Friend

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight.

**Betha**

**When You Need a Friend**

_Betha_

"We need to go back, you know", Seth says to me as we sit in some swimming pool in two giant inner tubes. We are taking the grand opportunity of using the pool of a family who went on vacation. It's not really trespassing because who in their right mind builds a pool in Minnesota?

"I don't want to go back" I say childishly. We had taken to stealing clothes whenever we needed them. I know it weighs heavily on Seth's conscience, but for me, it's living how we need to. I can't go home because home doesn't feel like home to me anymore.

"So what, you are going to go on the run, live like a nomad and keep me as you're guard dog?" Seth asks. Since we ran away, the two of us came to the conclusion that we are friends. We made a mistake, but I've forgotten about it and have gotten over, and I think Seth has too. But Seth has been frustrated with me lately. He likes to have plans, to know what he is chasing. I like freedom, I crave it. I want to have everything up in the air.

"I'm not going to keep you around if you don't want to stay. Leave if you want, but I'm going to keep running", I say to him, crossing my arms over my chest. I can feel the water underneath me heating up.

"You know that's not going to happen", growls Seth. I know I bring out something different in Seth. He seems frustrated with me all the time because we continue to argue like this.

"Why, because I might _eat_ a person. I'm a goddamn vampire Seth, I'm not some teddy bear. It's what I'm supposed to do", I fire back at him. We have had this familiar argument several times.

"It's my job to protect innocent human lives, and that means staying with you", he yells back at me. It's an instinctual thing, this need to protect me from myself, I realize. His anger is because of the wolf inside of him, the wolf whom he can abandon if he so choses. Although, Seth and I both know that he would never give up his ability to be a werewolf.

We've been living like nomadic vampires, and the similarity to the lifestyle is beginning to piss Seth off. That's completely understandable, but really, I don't need to be a part his whole self-identity crisis. That may sound selfish, but I'm too happy to care. For the first time, I feel who I am. The family structure that the Cullens used and the militant structure which the Volturi used make me feel limited. Living like a nomad makes me feel free. Emotions don't worry anymore because the only person I come in contact with is Seth. If I'm not around someone who I can harm, then I am fine.

"I'm going to phase", I hear Seth grumble. He does this every once in a while, to check in with his sister, with my parents, and with his pack. It makes him seem like my babysitter and it pisses me off. I don't need a family. I have everyone I need: me, myself, and I.

Suddenly, I feel something. I feel nausea and a strong feeling to GO THE OTHER WAY. Because I'm me, and curious, I go to follow the origin from where I feel it, but the repulsion is so strong that my body is fighting against me. I freeze the air around me. I'm thinking if I control the origin by freezing it, it won't be as strong.

With the temperature controlled around me, I can follow the feeling better. I need to maintain the cold. I focus my energy on the slight fear I feel of being left alone in a strange place with a strange something to follow. I continue following the thing when suddenly, I see a person. He is tall with blonde hair, he is also young, probably around Seth's age, or at least the age he appears to be. He smells like a vampire, even in the frozen state. I move around him cautiously, even though he can't move, I'm still nervous. He has red eyes, bright red eyes, he is most definitely a vampire.

"Seth!" I shout loudly into the woods. The extra volume is completely unnecessary, but it feels right at the time. "Seth, can you come here a minute?" I say again. The only response is a long drawn out howl. It sounds awful, but I'm a bit too concerned with the vampire frozen in front of me. I think he can hear me, but I'm not a hundred percent sure. "Okay, Mr. Vampire, I'm going to unfreeze you, but you have to promise not to hurt me. If you do, I won't hesitate in killing you", I saw. I hold my hand up to his face and let heat gently run through his body. His eyes are the first to thaw; they dart wildly back and forth. Soon he is completely unfrozen. He stands still, a good sign for me. "Okay, good. Just remain calm. Do you want to tell me who you are?" I ask.

He looks at me for a second, watching me carefully. "I'm Fred, how can you stand to be close to me right now?" he asks.

I look back slightly shocked; I should be asking the same question. "How can you stand to be near me, I just froze you to the ground", I reply.

He continues to stare at my quizzically. He looks intelligent, more so than other vampires. I hear Seth howl again. It's a howl that tells me to come back to him. I look at Fred and look back from where I came. In a split decision I say "come on". I grab his hand and we run into the forest.

We race back to the temporarily abandoned swimming pool. When we get close, I stop and begin to approach cautiously. Seth is already back in his human form. I walk into the backyard. I have grabbed Fred's hand and we walk cautiously. I really don't want a fight to erupt. Seth stares at me then at Fred, then back at me.

"Betha, what the hell?" he asks.

"Seth, this is Fred", I say lamely. Seth glares at me.

"Betha, can I speak to you for a moment, please", he says. With each word spit flies out of his mouth. I walk over hesitantly to Seth.

"Stay here", I say to Fred. He nods once. "What's going on, pal", I say to Seth. He glares at me ferociously.

"Well, since I feel like you _father_ I'm going to tell you like you're a child. We have three major problems. Problemo number one: you seem to like to pick up strays and that right there is not a vegetarian vampire, plus he just repulses me flat out. Issue number two: Alice saw the Volturi coming after the Cullens for _you_. Biggest problem number three: you aren't there and you are all the Volturi want. If they can't find you there, then they are going to kill all the Cullens. Is that what you want?" he asks.

I look up at him shocked. He could have delivered this news a little gentler. Plus, he thinks I want harm to come to my family. I will always love them, we are just having some issues. "Okay, fearless leader, what do you say we do?" I ask.

"I say that we ditch Freaky Fred over there, get our asses moving and try to save the Cullens and the rest of my pack", he breathes heavily.

"But I don't want to ditch Fred, can't he come with us", I beg like a child.

"You just met him", Seth says incredulously.

"I know, but he's really sweet and loyal and nice", I finish.

Seth rolls his eyes. "You have a strange thing for dog like humans. Yo, Fred, come here a minute", Seth orders.

The vampire surprisingly listens to Seth. He is calmer than most nomads we have come across. He seems kinder, gentler, and less animal like, more geek across the street like. "Yes?" he asks innocently.

"You can come with us if promise not to eat humans—or at least try—and if you just help us out", Seth winces.

"Who said I would want to come with you?" Fred asked. I looked up at him. Why wouldn't he want to come? Who wants to wonder around alone for the rest of eternity? That is just awful.

"We'll help you Fred, keep you safe. This world is too dangerous to go at it alone", I say. He stares at me, directly into my once blue eyes, and I feel it. I feel a pull towards him. Everyone else may feel repulsion when they stare at Fred, but I feel the strongest attraction that one person—vampire or human or werewolf or whatever there is—has felt.

XXX

Fred must have felt the freaky attraction too. He diced to come with us. Seth was phased most of the way. Sometimes he would phase back so that he could tell us what was going on. The Volturi were quickly approaching, Alice could not see whether we would arrive in time or not. The Volturi wanted to destroy the coven. If we did get there in time, it would be close, almost too close.

We ran too much for me to think about blood, and I think the same applied to Fred. We were constantly moving at top speed. If he would have tried to break away and kill a person, I wouldn't have been able to stop him, I had a mission.

Sometimes, we would have to stop for Seth to sleep for a few hours. At those times, I would hunt with Fred and tell him about myself, and he would tell me about himself. We were growing closer, perhaps falling in love, I don't know. But what I did know was that suddenly, Fred was someone who I couldn't live without.

We didn't come across anyone in our long journey. It was strange. People and animals and supernatural creatures seemed to fan away from us in a bubble. We were completely alone. I told Seth that running at night was practically unnecessary, but he insisted that we probably shouldn't break anymore Volturi laws. Seth told me that my family had a bad track record with visits from the Volturi and so that I better start coming up with a plan.

"I don't know what I'm going to do. I'm really not the best at verbal conversation. I'm much more of an act now talk to me later sort of girl", I argue with Seth.

"Yeah, not duh. You get _that_ from you father—er dad, I mean", Seth says and fixes as I frown at the word father.

"Betha, just calm down. You have all the cards in your hand. From what you've told me, the Volturi are going to listen to you. Aro wants you and he will do it at all costs. Nothing will stop him from trying to keep you alive, he might even stop an attack to listen to you. And your family is strong, he won't be able to attack them immediately, especially with your Aunt making most of the Volturi powers moot", Fred says as he pats my shoulder. He is level headed and down to earth, the complete opposite of me.

"Yeah, exactly", Seth smiles at Fred. The two have bonded, especially since Fred seems to take so well to the vegetarian diet.

"Okay, no more pep talks, I'm not a football player", I grumble. "Just let me quietly retreat to the treacherous depths of my mind, please", I say. They both laugh at me, and I hold up a smoking finger threateningly. They stop.

Seth phases back, but almost immediately he comes back out of the woods in human form. "We have a problem. Alice thinks that the Volturi will be there tomorrow", he says. His face is pale. It is strange to see Seth afraid.

"If we run full speed with no stops, we could make it, take the shortest route. We could go faster if one of us carried you", Fred says.

Seth doesn't want to work with that idea, but even he has to admit, it is the only way to get there. It's awkward, us carrying Seth, but we do move faster. We continue to run for nonstop for hours. Seth phases every once in a while so that we can get an update, but we don't get any better news. Seth comes back from phasing extremely pale. "They are there", he says.

I nearly fall to my knees with shock. Fred helps me stand again. "It's ok. We are almost there, a few minutes at the most", he says as he grabs Seth again. We are running, full speed. We get to a clearing. We hide in the trees. I need the perfect time to come out, to think about what I'm going to say.

I hear Edward laugh. "Aro, I do believe that what you have lost has come back to us" he says while still laughing.

a/n: Finally, this chapter is done. I hope you enjoy, and please review. I think this story may have one or two more chapters, not sure, but I'm excited for it to be finished. I also changed a few things in previous chapters, but the story still works out without knowing what I changed in previous chapters. Once again, please review and enjoy.


	14. For You, Father

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight.

**Betha**

**For You, Father**

_Betha_

"Hello, Aro, you look like hell, missed me?" I say. His red eyes turn to me, blazing into my soul. I despise them, because my eyes have long turned golden.

I look towards my mum and dad, and smile. My mum has that face that vampires get when they are crying, but can't shed any tears. I know that someone, either Leah or Edward or Jacob must've told my mum that we were coming home. Dad is smiling at me, but then frowns when he sees who follows me into the clearing. An additional vampire and Seth do not seem to be the best choice.

Aunt Bella looks strained. She must be extending her shield to protect me now, perhaps even Fred. I secretly hope she is protecting Fred as well, just in case anything happens.

"Betha, my daughter, you look well", Aro says as the sickly words roll off his disgusting tongue.

"I wish I could stay the same about you, but you still look like an ugly creep", I mumble. Mumbling doesn't make a difference in the vampire world, it's just a sign of disrespect really.

Aro brushes the comment about his appearance off. "I see you've accumulated several new, uh, friends. They could all come home with you, they could come and live in Italy with us if you would like."

"Your deluded if you think she is ever coming back to live with you and your—, "Dad started.

"I'm never coming back to live with you Aro, and you're sadly disillusioned if you think that will ever come into fruition", I say, loudly.

"And I taught her those words, I'm so proud", I hear Nessie say. I hadn't even noticed she is here. I have a feeling that was a tough battle for her to win, but there she is, standing next to Jacob and petting his mangy head.

"Well my dear, number wise, and power wise, you don't really seem to have a choice on who to come along with", Aro adds. Vampires begin to emerge from the surrounding area. Before Seth and I had left, we had heard reports that the Volturi was weakened due to my unintentional killing of Chelsea, but that assumption is wrong. Clearly, the Volturi name still holds some semblance of power in the vampire world.

"I don't think you can necessarily argue powers anymore Aro. Without Chelsea, our bonds are stronger than yours. Love is always a better bond than fear, it took this family to teach me that, and I will kill anyone who dares to hurt them", I say as I walk forward, getting closer to Aro, getting in his face.

"Really, because I believe I've brought several of your friends along with me", Aro says. I should have smelled them, but I had not thought about it. Jane and Alec step from around Aro. They had been promoted and their cloaks were now a darker black, closer to that of Aro's.

"Hello, Betha", Alec says. I take a step back. Rationally, he cannot do anything to me, I know that Aunt Bella's shield extends to me. She has told me, several times, that Alec's power cannot penetrate the shield.

"Hello, Alec. I would say that you look good, but black really isn't your color", I smile. He smiles back, but underneath is pure evil that I know better than anyone.

"Betha, your brother and sister really want you back in the family. They miss you. The three of you together would be unstoppable", Aro says, staring at me.

"Well, the thing is, Aro, I kind of like being an only child. And only kids, we have a wrap of being a little temperamental, especially when others try to take what we perceive to be ours" I say as a bring my hands up to my chest. I concentrate. I haven't used my power for a long time, and I hadn't thought about using it for even longer. But now, at this moment, I let the anger overrun me, pulse through my veins.

I feel the heat first. My toes warm and it moves through my body. Up my legs, to my belly and through my fingertips. I see them glow a soft orange over my alabaster skin.

Aro takes a step back. Alec and Jane follow in his wake.

"I swear to God, Aro, if you threaten them, any of them, you will not exist anymore. NONE OF YOU WILL!" I scream across the clearing. "I will kill anyone who dares to mess with the Cullens. I am the asset that you could never control. You treated me like a pawn, a treasure, a toy. You see what I am, and all you see is a POWER tattooed across my forehead. These people see me, the person: the damaged person, the abused girl, the scared child that you created. If you want to mess with me and you die, it's no one's fault but your own. You created me, but you don't care about me", I thunder.

Aro continues to walk back, but I am hot, burning. The flames are tickling in my hands, turning around each other, creating a ball of fire. "I'm going to kill you", I whisper.

Suddenly, red hair is jumping on me, pulling me down to the ground. For a second I don't know what's going on.

"Betha, you don't want to that", Fred says into my ear.

I fight him, but I'm afraid to hurt him, so I feel the fire leaving me. "Fred", I whisper, but I give up. He's stronger than me, physically, and with my restraining my power, I can't fight him off. I stop fighting.

Aro doesn't even turn around. He keeps walking away, repulsed. When I stop fighting, Fred continues to hold me tight. He's hugging me, squeezing me like he doesn't want me to go away. I realize in an instant that I need him.

"He's not coming back. He thinks you're more trouble that you're worth, and he's slightly _repulsed_", Edwards says as the whole family moves towards us.

"You kicked ass, Betha. It was like a scholarly beat down", Seth said as he came out of the woods with his sister and Jake, playfully slapping his alpha.

"We are just happy to have you back, sweetie", mum says as she bends down to help me up.

"And who is this?" dad asks as Fred stands up next to me.

"This is Fred, he repulses people", I say, smiling as he wraps his arm around my waist.

"Obviously not you", dad mutters as he leans in to hug me. I laugh, nothing is wrong.

I don't understand why I agreed to do this. Personally, I wanted to run away, but everyone else seemed to think that was a bad idea. When I mentioned it to Nessie, she was under the distinct impression that Aunt Alice would kill both of us if she found out.

I look in the mirror and moan.

"If you don't hush Betha, I will make your life miserable in ways that you cannot imagine", Aunt Alice hisses.

"But Alice, I'm getting tired", I moan.

"You're a vampire and vampires don't get tired. I went through this with Nessie and Bella when she was human, and neither one of them died, so I think you will be fine", she fires.

"Fine", I grumble.

"Oh, Alice, she looks beautiful", mum says as she comes in the room.

"You aren't giving her too much of a hard time are you, Alice?" Aunt Bella says as she comes into the room.

"No, I'm being perfectly civil", Alice lies as she smiled.

"Civil my—", I start but am cut off by a toothbrush being shoved in my mouth.

"Brush away, you don't want your breath to smell like blood", Nessie sings as she dances into the room. She is dressed in a beautiful green dress that goes to the ground. It is soft around her growing curves.

"Because his won't", I retort back as soon as the offending article is removed from my mouth.

"I don't know why you waiting so long for this, it's really quite fun", Nessie insists. She is full of bull, whenever it's her turn, she raises hell.

"Because we enjoy living in sin, why else", I mumble under my breath.

"Please don't say that while I'm in the room, dear, it doesn't make me feel too good", mum says. I would have blushed if I still could have. I turned back to the mirror and stuck my tongue out at myself and then went cross eyed. Nessie laughed quietly in the corner. Aunt Alice scowls at me while she continues to work on my hair, twisting the curls into intricate patterns.

"Rose, I think we should braid it, what do you think?" Aunt Alice asks as she scowls at my head.

"I agree, but you need to hurry, you are running a little slow", mum adds.

"That's because my participant is so disagreeable", Aunt Alice muttered as she quickly grabbed a bottle of gel and smoothing and cream and began rubbing it all over my hair. Within seconds, my hair was tied in an intricate braid around my head, loosely attached with pins. The golden waves were gorgeous, looking like a halo.

Within another ten minutes my face is beautifully made up with green eye shadow that matches Nessie's dress and soft pink colored lips. Then Aunt Alice puts a simple pair of designer stilettos with four inch heels onto my small feet.

"Stand up", she orders.

I do as she as told and I go to the mirror. I smile when I look into the mirror, and if I could have cried, I probably would have. I look beautiful. I look like my family with my crystal golden eyes and my perfectly smooth skin. My hair looks like an angels, and the makeup makes me look like the blushing bride that I am today. The dress was simple and loose. I dislike anything that is tight, it makes me uncomfortable. It was a pure white, as pure as humanly possible with short sleeves and an empire waist.

"You didn't want a real veil", Alice said as she came up next to me holding a small white birdcage wedding veil. "Despite the fact that you think I didn't listen to you, I really did." She smiles. For the first time ever to me, she seems really small.

"Am I disrupting a moment?" a male voice asks.

I turn around and look at my dad, in a tux. He has always looked more like my brother than like a father, but I can't help the emotions I feel for him. He is my father.

"No, we are ready for you", Alice sings. She touches my arm as she leaves the room taking Nessie and Aunt Bella with her. I'm left with my mum and dad.

"You really look beautiful, kid", dad says. I smile staring up at him.

Mum stands next to him, smiling at me as she wraps an arm around his waist.

"Thank you so much", I say as I hug both of them.

"Be careful, honey, you don't want to mess up your makeup", my mum laughs softly.

"Mum, I'm trying to be serious. I have no words to thank you for everything you've done for me, you saved me; from myself and from anyone else."

"Except Fred", dad mumbles.

I ignore him and continue talking. "You took me in, raised me as if I were a baby and made me the person I am today. I have no way to thank you. You are and will be the only parents I have ever known", I finish. I thank god that I cannot cry.

"You don't have to worry about it. We wanted you, and you benefitted our lives in such a positive manner. You gave me something to live for, exactly what I wanted and needed", mum said.

"Now let's marry you off", dad says as he claps his hands together. Mum and I laugh and I hug her when she leaves the room. "Let's go, kid", dad says as he grabs my arm.

We leave the room and make our way outside. It's just the family and some friends. Seth is standing with Fred. In the past ten years, the two of them had become close friends, especially as Jacob had spent more and more time with Nessie.

Nessie walks in front of dad and I. She looks beautiful, and she is absolutely glowing. I can tell she is smiling at Jake, he is smiling too large for her not to be. It is strange for me to be the center of attention. I'm not sure I like it, but in a second I see Fred standing at the end of the aisle. He stands to his full height, he was whispering something to Seth. He smiles.

Fred rarely smiles, but when I'm talking to him, he smiles much more, and supposedly his natural repulsiveness becomes more pleasant. In ten years, neither of us has aged a day, but our relationship has grown stronger, and I know I could never live without him.

Dad gives me away and the ceremony concludes. Alice is right (like she always is) it is beautiful.

After the reception, Fred and I are in the family's newly acquired helicopter. I think we mostly bought it because dad and Uncle Jasper got their flying licenses together and now they love to fly any planes.

"That was fun, we should do it again, at least in the next hundred years", Fred says to me.

"Don't let Alice hear you say it, and don't even think about it. She will see it and then we will have to do it", I laugh as I cuddle closer to him.

"I guess you're right", he says. I feel his laughter against my neck.

"I wish my father could have been there", I say without thinking.

"What—you mean, Aro?" Fred asks surprised.

"Yeah, I just so I could have said kiss my ass, and maybe thank you. I'm glad he turned me, otherwise I would have never met you. And, I think maybe, somewhere deep in his soul, my happiness could have made him happy, and even if not, I could always have teased him that he didn't get what he wanted for the first time in his life", I say as I stare at Fred's golden eyes.

"You are so strange sometimes, Betha", Fred laughs.

I kiss him, deeply.

I am so happy.


End file.
